Schrödinger's Boner 

A situation where a penis is starting to get hard, but is not solid, and at the same time, not completely flaccid. While a penis is in this state, anything could collapse the quantum wave, and render the penis either hard, or flaccid.

Dude, Jackie gave me this sexy look after our date, and until she came upstairs to my room, I had a Schrödinger's Boner.

or

I was this restaurant, and there was this waitress with a nice ass. Once she turned around and I saw here face though, I lost my Schrödinger's Boner.

Schrödinger's Boner by MintBerryChrunch April 13, 2011

D2 Boner 

The kind of massive raging boner that you can only get when visiting the D2 Dining Hall at Virginia Tech. If you go to D2 and you don't have a boner then you must have a vagina.

Norm: "I have the biggest D2 boner right now! Look at all the fucking food!"

Will: "Man that Calculus test was harder than that D2 boner..."

D2 Boner by iheartD2 December 11, 2016

Reverse Boner 

The exact opposite of a boner. The premise is that something turns you off so much that your weener goes inside out.

"...dude did you see that documentary about failed breast implants?...that gave me a total reverse boner"

Reverse Boner by SooperHans April 27, 2006

Pro Boner 

Evading legal repercussion by showing up with a camera to fuck a hooker. You pay the camera man/producer the agreed upon amount and he pays the hooker. Then you work for free or "Pro Boner" to make the adult film.

I'm gonna fuck that hooker/undercover cop pro boner

Pro Boner by NearSightedGyno October 10, 2018

Pseudo-boner 

An occurrence when your pants or shirt cause an unflattering bulge to appear, giving all who look at you the impression that you are slightly aroused.

Guy #1: Whoa, man! She's hot but not that hot.

Guy #2: No bro, its just a pseudo-boner.

Guy #1: Oh, okay then. (awkward silence)

Pseudo-boner by Common Misconceiver May 23, 2009

tag boner 

When the tag in the back of your shirt keeps sticking out, no matter how many times you put it back down.

Friend reaches behind you and tucks your tag back into your shirt. Five minutes later, friend gives you an odd look and tells you that your tag boner is back.

tag boner by cadkitten & elyachan June 30, 2009

bike boner 

A bike boner is what a cyclist gets when they see a very nice bicycle either on the road, in a shop or locked to a bike rack.

In most cases it is a bicycle that they themselves cannot afford.

A hipster would see a fixie all decked out in radical ironic colors and totally pop a bike boner.

A Performance Cyclist would see a Trek or Cervelo decked out with all the most unnecessarily expensive components and get a raging spandex bike boner.

A Cross-Country cyclist would see panniers, saddlebags and fenders and erect a towering bike boner.

bike boner by fireproofpants October 3, 2010