Jesus-fix

To fix a problem that has been stumping someone else in an incredibly simplistic way on your first try, often by hitting or touching the object in question. The method used to fix the device may have already been tried multiple times, but just didn't work until you came along. This is reminiscent of how Jesus Christ supposedly healed the sick just by touching them.

My car horn was broken for months, but Tanner Jesus-fixed it on the first time he pushed it.

My friend's phone wasn't working for hours yesterday, but I came in and Jesus-fixed it when I turned it off and on even though she had already tried that five times.

by DaskinRobins October 7, 2011

finding jesus

A abosolutely hilarious ripoff of finding Nemo. just look at the damn front cover y'all.

AYO IS THAT FINDING JESUS?!

by G520 April 24, 2023

Jetbridge Jesus

The supernatural power that heals airline passengers of their aliments in flight, and is exemplified by the phenomena of more passengers needing wheelchairs when a flight boards then need them on arrival. Most often seen on flights to/from Florida.

Flight attendant 1: we had 20 passengers in wheelchairs when we boarded my flight in Chicago, but when we got to Miami all but 4 walked off.

Flight Attendant 2: Wow! Another miraculous healing by Jetbridge Jesus!

Flight Attendant 1: Amen and Praise be!

by Kronl January 5, 2023

Lube Jesus

Lube Jesus is a god said to have an biliary to transform water to lube, his ability allows him to burst into your house with lube and fuck the shit out of you

Maaan Michael really just lost his virginity to Lube Jesus

by Cloud buyyy April 15, 2021

Redneck Jesus

The nickname NASCAR gaming YouTuber Michael Mrucz uses for NASCAR Hall of Famer: Dale Earnhardt Jr in his videos. Sometimes also called “BOYYY” in his skit shorts by his father, corresponding with Jr calling his father “DAAAAD” in the skits

“REDNECK JESUSSSSS! Who the hell’s team is he on?”
-Michael Mrucz on YouTube

by The Only Cody Ware Superfan September 11, 2022

Mach Jesus

Someone Travelling so fast, that colliding with one small object will be fatal.

Tom Cruise was going Mach Jesus to avoid being late for the shoot.

by AlphaJPM September 15, 2022

Jesus high

A wonderful, joyfilled peace and completely overwhelming sense of knowing and feeling the love of God envelope you. This often happens after meditating on God's Word/the Bible, singing praise or worship songs, or realizing and thanking God for all His goodness and the things He has carried you through. There is no better high like a Jesus high.

I used to be a pot head but then I finally quit because I got more into Jesus. He changed my life! Jesus highs are free and will not go away in Heaven! He really loves you, too, bro!

by I love rabbits January 9, 2022