Gunneritis (n.)
A chronic and incurable psychological condition affecting football fans, characterized by unwavering support for Arsenal Football Club despite repeated heartbreak, underachievement, and self-inflicted setbacks.
Symptoms:
False hope syndrome – Convincing oneself that "this is our year" every August, only to be mathematically humbled by March.
Top 4 Fever – Viewing fourth place as a trophy and celebrating it accordingly.
Trophy Hallucinations – Repeatedly reminiscing about the Invincibles era as if it happened yesterday, despite it being over two decades ago.
Red Card Rage Disorder – A tendency for one’s team to collect unnecessary red cards at crucial moments, often ruining promising matches.
Europa League Fatigue – The annual cycle of dropping from the Champions League group stage or bottling Europa League knockout rounds.
Managerial Denial Syndrome – Believing every new manager is "the one," before inevitably calling for their sacking within three seasons.
Spurs Obsession – Measuring success against Tottenham, even when finishing trophyless.
Prognosis:
No known cure.
Condition worsens in February/March when the annual title collapse occurs.
Symptoms temporarily subside after occasional FA Cup wins but quickly return.
Treatment:
Lower expectations.
Embrace banter.
Consider switching to a stress-free sport like chess.
Accept that Arsenal will Arsenal, no matter what.
A chronic and incurable psychological condition affecting football fans, characterized by unwavering support for Arsenal Football Club despite repeated heartbreak, underachievement, and self-inflicted setbacks.
Symptoms:
False hope syndrome – Convincing oneself that "this is our year" every August, only to be mathematically humbled by March.
Top 4 Fever – Viewing fourth place as a trophy and celebrating it accordingly.
Trophy Hallucinations – Repeatedly reminiscing about the Invincibles era as if it happened yesterday, despite it being over two decades ago.
Red Card Rage Disorder – A tendency for one’s team to collect unnecessary red cards at crucial moments, often ruining promising matches.
Europa League Fatigue – The annual cycle of dropping from the Champions League group stage or bottling Europa League knockout rounds.
Managerial Denial Syndrome – Believing every new manager is "the one," before inevitably calling for their sacking within three seasons.
Spurs Obsession – Measuring success against Tottenham, even when finishing trophyless.
Prognosis:
No known cure.
Condition worsens in February/March when the annual title collapse occurs.
Symptoms temporarily subside after occasional FA Cup wins but quickly return.
Treatment:
Lower expectations.
Embrace banter.
Consider switching to a stress-free sport like chess.
Accept that Arsenal will Arsenal, no matter what.
by BurgerBucks March 11, 2025
Get the GUNNERITISmug. A person who goes above and beyond to exceed expectations. It only has a negative connotation to those who aren't gunners. The term isn't actually about peers. It is about the person who wants it most. The person willing to stay up every night of the week to get it done.
by Duchess Urbino January 11, 2023
Get the Gunnermug. A person who masturbates frequently, in some cases in front of others, term used commonly in jails and prisons
by Op it's doogie July 1, 2016
Get the Gunnermug. by Poophole screwer June 8, 2022
Get the Gunners plugmug. Gunner is an awesome dude who can deadlift over 10,000lbs and has very awesome facial hair. He isn't fat and actually has amazing abs and he's really hot. He drives an amazing 2003 Ford Danger Ranger and it doesn't get annoying when he says "Yeah Buddy"
by Itchy Dick November 23, 2021
Get the Gunnermug. Squat down, put you hand behind you right leg and masturbate vigorously until you explode everywhere like a machine gun, ergo Russian gunner
Boy 1: " I tried the Russian gunner last night"
Boy 2: "Oh? What happened"
Boy 1: "I think I declared war"
Boy 2: "Oh? What happened"
Boy 1: "I think I declared war"
by ThePandaKing November 1, 2011
Get the The Russian Gunnermug. by Some dude with a tractor March 22, 2021
Get the Gunnermug.