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wank blimp

Hold the tip of you foreskin whilst cumming to keep your glorious wank mess free.
Dude I totally did a wank blimp last night
by Wank blimp October 13, 2017
mugGet the wank blimpmug.

Wank Bank

A mental folder of photos used for the sexual pleasuring of yourself.
{Man mid-sex} I'll have to save that for the wank bank!
by Peachy_107 May 30, 2022
mugGet the Wank Bankmug.

radar wank

Friends and family around feeling horny?

Have a radar wank.

The act of wanking with someone close by while also being aware you could be caught at any moment so you are ready to hide your wood.
My wife was being frigid she went downstairs so I decided to have a radar wank.
by Ronk5 October 5, 2023
mugGet the radar wankmug.

Wank Bandit

The act of sneaking into your neighbours house, connecting to and watching some porn on their own wifi until you ejaculate on a random thing in their home e.g. bed, sink, kettle etc. and go home like nothing happened.

This can also be done in schools, shops or other public venues.
Keith - “I left our neighbour Eugene a little present inside the dishwasher!”
Fredrick - “Dude that’s nuts”
Keith - “I know but not the kinda of nuts your thinking of, I pulled a wank bandit on him”
Fredrick - ...
Keith - “I also brutally slaughtered his wife and children”
Fredrick - “Nice”
by WalnutPaste April 20, 2020
mugGet the Wank Banditmug.

Safety Wank

The act of masturbation prior to a sexual encounter, used to prolong intercourse.
Person 1: "Brooooo, I'm hooking up with Amy tonight!"
Person 2: "Oh nice dude, she's so hot!"
Person 1: "Tell me about it, I'm going to need a quick safety wank before going to her place."
by BicBoi4000 August 27, 2021
mugGet the Safety Wankmug.

muppet wank

During coitus, one partner (or a third person) inserts their full hand into the anus of the woman and grasps the man's penis through the walls of the rectum and vagina. They then proceed to masturbate the penis while simultaneously fisting the woman rectally.
Dude, I got muppet wanked by my girlfriends BFF during a threesome last night.
by Inoffensive_Account August 20, 2016
mugGet the muppet wankmug.

Crab-Wank

To squat down on your toes, reaching under the leg to masturbate in a downward motion.
Common sport amongst contractors working away from home. Of an evening, should they be feeling frisky and risky, they may strip off, carefully climb up on to the B&B’s sink rim, tiptoes on the unsupported edge. Whilst in this expert position he may decide to crab-wank one out whist his face/eye is pressed against the mirror, eyeballing himself until completion.
Martin: How was your evening Andy?
Andy: Pretty tragic really.
Martin: But I thought you had your night planned? Kebab and a crab-wank you said??
Andy: The kebab was great and I was after a thrill before bed.
Martin: What’s tragic about that? Did you manage the expert?
Andy: Almost, but the sink came off the wall and I couldn’t finish.
Martin: Still, better than Steve last year, his sink shattered and cut his femoral artery.

Andy: Hummnn, I may go back to the floor for a bit…
by Goatboy Grasshead June 8, 2021
mugGet the Crab-Wankmug.

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