monkey physics

The inexplicable physics that dictates the world of Nintendo's "Super Monkey Ball" games.

The monkey physics made it so when I barely tapped the bomb I flew way over my mark.

by Stuart J December 5, 2005

monkey ring

when you rub the outer area of your partners butthole with your knuckle.

Last night I gave Lena a monkey ring until she shit on my knuckle.

by bigsexy.inc May 3, 2018

cringe monkey

Slapping an un-erect penis repeatedly either side of a sleeping partners face, so they wake rubbing their eyes like the 'cringe monkey' emoji

I couldn't sleep, so I gave her a cringe monkey to wake her up for a blowy

by IorekSholto February 11, 2017

Batch Monkey

(n.) Commonly used to describe disgruntiled business owners that are unaware of the procedures needed to be taken in order to get paid from a credit card terminal, software, or POS device...

Most people who are "Batch Monky's" tend to believe that if they pay a monthly fee to run credit cards, it's everyones else responsibility to make certain they get money in THEIR pockets.

-- "You guys have no idea how to do your job, I haven't gotten a deposit in 3 weeks!! WTF is wrong with you assholes. I WANT MY MONEY NOW!! I pay you guys every month, WHERE'S MY MONEY?!"

--"Well, sir/ma'am it's standard credit card processing procedure that you close your batch every evening after business, you're missing $34,596.94 as a deposit?! Simply close your batch!"

--"No one told me that I had to do that! Okay, I'll press the CLOSE BATCH button next time, THANKS... Goodbye"

--"Thank you for calling anyway...(click) you Batch Monkey Ass MothaFucka, do MY job. Heh!"

by ALKAIZER June 25, 2009

plague monkey

An employee who still comes in to work sick and spreads his germs all over the place when he should stay home.

Bob came in to work sicker than a plague monkey just to get his work done. Now everybody is going to get sick.

by Roy Mulders May 20, 2007

silly monkey

This is commonly known as a teasing name used to refer to someone who quite often does things that make the common person go "WTF" and literally "LOL".

Why? Zzz...you bore me because your not a silly monkey.
Waizee

by lol101 August 6, 2009

Howling Monkey

When a girl gives 2 handjobs and a blowjob at the same time to 3 different guys

Dude Amy gave me Jim and Andy a Howling Monkey last night

by Kpahx October 28, 2010