jesus freak

a person who seriously writes a definition with an overbearingly detailed explaination in here.

"I went to Bible camp every weekend this summer!"
"Beth, you're such a Jesus freak."

by Cmakkk October 19, 2007

jesus christ

the first magician to go public with his tricks, but seeing as people back then were like really stupid they thought he was a god: idiots

dude lets go see jesus christ man hes gonna turn water into wine!
how the hell is he gunna do that?
dnt knw all i knw is we look away then we turn around nad yea man its changed its insane!

by jackass_12345 May 28, 2007

jesus tits

A exclamation of pain,joy,ect.

Jesus tits i stubbed my toe.
Jesus tits thats an awesome purse.

by Klaireabell October 23, 2007

jesus x

Remember: Whenever we say "Christmas," Christ always comes first. And whenever we say "X-mas," X comes first. Not many people know that Jesus Christ's real name is "Jesus Little." He changed His name to "Jesus X" to show that He was His own person and didn't need the white man's slave name... He was His own man. Which explains the meaning behind X-mas. It's just short for "X-Man's." Because the X-Men had superpowers... just like Jesus.

jesus x, praise be unto him, he can shoot l.a.s.e.r. beams out of his eyes.

by jimomaha April 7, 2008

Jesus Fuck

When you lay her down on a crucifix, and nail her three times. On the third day, you'll be able to get a rise again.

Bob: "I heard Sara got Jesus Fucked last summer".

Tony: "Is that where you put her on a crucifix and nail her three times?"

Bob: "Yeah dude."

Tony: "Holy, holy, holy lord. God of power and might."

by The mysterious Mr.R April 16, 2011

jesus christ

some dude commonly believed by the same kind of morons

jesus christ? actually doesn't exist!

by chun hyang February 6, 2008

Jesus Christ

1. A word used to express anger. Avoid saying this in front of Jesus Freaks, it will upset them.

2. Some guy stated in the Bible. He supposedly died on a cross and died for our sins. Now he's gonna save us all or something like that. Of course we all know this is absolutely retarded, after all, the only reference is a really big book.

1. Jesus Christ, why the hell is my wife doing another man in my bed??

2. All the Bible is, is a big book, ok?? Who wrote the book? God? Ok. Yeah. God wrote the Bible and then came down to earth and gave it to some guy so he could show it to everyone. YEAH RIGHT. You know what really happened? Some guy wrote all this bull so that he could make some money.

And how come even in the Bible, men have all the power? I though "Jesus" believed in equality for everyone!! Wtf?

Tell you what, when Jesus "Saves" you, I want you to come down here with him and show me. THEN I'll believe it. Thank you.

by XxXI.AM.NOT.AN.AETHEISTXxX April 4, 2009