Sanding alabaster in bed

An excellent handjob.

She's a master, its like she's sanding alabaster in bed and I'm the sculpture.

by MsSaskatchewan February 22, 2013

bed pig

A small to medium sized domestic cat that when sleeping in the bed with its owner takes up 75% or more of the mattress area.

This horizontal chihuahua is a total bed pig.

by James_onthe_Rocks1 January 9, 2018

I was under the bed

Had a phenomenal sleep
Sleeping good
Knocked out

Hey, sorry I missed your call, I was under the bed lol.

by Letmehelp May 8, 2025

Bed shit crazy

When someone is so off the rails, that they’ll shit on your side of the bed in an attempt to get revenge.

“Man, that girl Amber dropped a shit right on the bed.”
“Yeah bro, she is bed shit crazy!”

by meowverseer May 7, 2022

Goona Bed

The hide a bed in a hotel room where you can avoid sharing a room with your family on a family vacation and have your own space so you can goon (masturbate) at night on family vacation without your parents knowing.

I’ve seen this hot Latinas ass on the beach on my vacation to Mexico. I can’t wait to goon on the goona bed to that Latinas ass tonight.

by Sussy boi April 7, 2025

Bed Sniffer

Australian slang; An investigator from a welfare agency, who comes to your house to test your eligibility and question weather or not you are having sexual relations with your housemates. (As income could be less for people in a defacto relationship, than that of people simply co-residing.

Had to set up a second bed in the spare room today, because the bed sniffers are coming to investigate.

by 3BG October 4, 2019

Ciggarettes in bed

The moment shared between a man and a woman after dirty, rough, disgusting and often less than usual fucking, kissing, humping and cumming. Usually between a Bethany and a Joshua...

Sometimes this sex is watched by a group of unseen eyes, most of which are insanely attracted to both Bethany and Joshua..

This sex is special but still would disturb the average viewer....

"Ciggarettes in bed" is when...

Bethany - "Next time don't stop choking me when I pass out..."
Joshua - "You're a fucking freak, go get the the smokes so we can have a cigarette in bed"

by AceOfSpadesUnknown February 16, 2024