Bed Beating

The act of dry humping ones mattress for hours until completion.

DUDE did you hear about Ethan? they found him bed beating himself to sleep!"

by Red D. Mungus August 20, 2025

Bed bomb

Saturating the bed with farts so that when someone pulls back the covers to get in they get a face full of stale farts.

I like to bed bomb a girl early in our relationship, a taste of things to come.

It's a wonder you're single.

by Shuaman June 23, 2019

bed bolt

When your bedroom lacks any type of device for locking the door, forcing you to push your bed up against the door to secure it.

My parents removed the locks from my door so they could come in as they please; forcing me to resort to bed bolting my door.

by albinorineo February 18, 2013

Saddle up the hay bed

Saddle up the hay bed is a way of saying hit the hay but instead of falling asleep you're preparing to go to sleep.

Well fellas I'm gonna saddle up the hay bed.

by MF SHAGGY January 23, 2020

Shit the bed

To get out of bed very early on a day where you would normally sleep in.

"You're up early! Did you shit the bed?"

by Ubeenbamboozledson November 7, 2022

bed chocolate

Residual excretion in, on, or around one's mattress, which is later mistaken for crumbs of chocolate.

Willard: Bernadine shat on my dick last Thursday evening while we were sleeping.
Hobo 1: Well, that's unfortunate...
Willard : The worst part is that I thought the bed chocolate is was a piece of the candy bar that I was eating yesterday afternoon for elevenses.

Hobo 2: STANKY!

by killbo December 15, 2011

bed-spread

1.) The substance covering sheets after sex.

2.) The method by which a single sleeper can occupy an entire king size mattress.

We knocked the bottom out bae, I feel like I am in a sandwich with all this bed-spread.

I always have to sleep on the sofa, Karen is a master of bed-spreading.

by aalh October 9, 2020