If you throw a shit into the room, you better be able to lock the door

If you make a controversial statement, it is best you have the evidence to support it.

Mark: I'm thinking of telling Evgeny that Communism is overrated
*shocked faces*
Adam: Mate, if you throw a shit into the room, you better be able to lock the door!

If you throw a shit into the room, you better be able to lock the door by Hoonta January 27, 2012

Sorry, I don't sprechen the douche. 

Response to someone either being a douche, saying something douchey, or telling you to get an Über.

Play on "sprechen sie deutsch"

Q: "Why don't you just take an Über?"

A: "Sorry, I don't sprechen the douche."

Sorry, I don't sprechen the douche. by Bob Rogue July 15, 2016

The Dictionary 

A list of boring words and their definitions in a thousand pages or more. Only the truly cultured people go to Urban Dictionary for all their wanting to know what a word means means.

Virgin: Wanna read the The Dictionary together? Girl: No, The Dictionary sucks, just read to Urban Dictionary instead. Virginn: Ok... :.(

The Dictionary by Cultured Person October 11, 2019

Guys. Guys, I ate all the doritos.  

Something you say just to make noise, so your friends will talk to you.

-Silence-
Person 1: Guys. Guys, I ate all the doritos.
Person 2: What the fuck?

Guys. Guys, I ate all the doritos. by embem January 11, 2009

Ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? 

JOKER:
Tell me, my friend, have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

Line habitually used by the Joker (Jack Nicholson) in Tim Burton's Batman. Best movie in the franchise, pre-Christian Bale.

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? I ask that of all my prey. I just like the sound of it.

Ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? by Fearman May 28, 2008

The Discharge

To have sex with a girl, and immediately before you climax, you taser your penis, so that your partner receives not only semen, but 10,000 volts of pure love.

Bro, i gave her the discharge last night, she was convulsing with love for about 10 minutes.

The Discharge by fannybandit9389 January 7, 2011

Cappin the dragon 

Surgery reversing circumcision reattaching the foreskin through a delicate process involving the skillful hand of a Jewish surgeon. The process can only be completed if the foreskin has been saved since conception. No skin graphs are allowed you sick fucks. The surgery is completed with the blessing of the god parents soothingly stroking the foreskin till it regains proper circulation.

Jake was at the local barber shop when he over heard a conversation among his local dirty compadres. He was curious to as what was adrift. They responded "ese nostros cappin los dragons." Jake thought to himself the dirty Mexicans are catching dragons in glad wear? (I'd use hispanic but Im a racist.) He was quickly filled in and left with an enthusiastic smile of optimism.... Cappin the dragon!

Cappin the dragon by semalancho June 13, 2010