crap and slap

While a dude shits and he beats off at the same time.

Did Dennis go to the bathroom to crap and slap? Gross.

by AnnabelS February 11, 2015

Crap on boot

To be treated with the same contempt and loathing as crap on someone's boot. This is normally in the work environment.

"Do you feel well looked after in your job"
"Not really, just Crap on boot"

by Kill_crazy January 23, 2024

crap chaps

Directionally opposite to a squirrel tail. (Which is when an infant's diaper can no longer contain The sheer volume of shit which forces it to vector up and create a tail out of poop)

In this instance, The shit vectors down the leg.
Creating a pair of chaps made out of poop.

You're welcome.

The brown wet stains seeping through my son's onesie was a telltale sign that he put on his crap chaps.

by Ruiner81 June 26, 2022

Crap-path

When two friends start a conversation with both parties being fully aware of the falsity of their statements. The following exchange of words will typically be a hilarious and surreal exchange of related but obviously false claims. This dialogue of known lies ends when one of the friends points out that they are walking up, going up, or being led up the crap path. This is a good time to stop as continued crap path mileage usually results in the exchange getting beyond a joke and not being funny anymore.

"I got a lion in a toy shop once."
"What? A real one?"
"...yeah."
"Well where is it now then? In the cupboard?"
"Yep."
"Get it out then."
"He won't take guests after eight."
At the point when continuing would go beyond a joke, the conversation should climax with somebody saying or shouting "Crap-path" before the humour dies and it stops being funny.

by PiedPiperOfParty May 21, 2010

Crap In My Eye

When an eyelash or dirt gets in the sides of you're eye.

"Ah!" yelled Jerry.
"What's Wrong?" said Sam.
"I just got some crap in my eye," Jerry replied.

by RubixMan August 4, 2017

Crap-gathering point

A place where hoarders and/or procrastinators put things like dirty dishes, books or other items.

When I checked on my roommate, their room had several crap-gathering points consisting of dirty plates and bowls; their filthy clothes; and empty soda cans.

by anonymous June 13, 2021

Obligatory Crap

When someone gives you a hassle because they are supposed to, not because they mean it.

I'm surprised your wife let you play golf today? She gave me some obligatory crap, but she wanted to go shopping anyway.

by TartanMarine June 19, 2010