Puts a hangover to shame. Very similar, minus alcohol. You could have waken up feeling totally exhausted after a night of hard partying/dancing, so sore in fact the only thing in the known universe that could cause such tremendous discomfort and pain would be Jesus mauling you.
*next day after party*
Alex: Duuude...that party was intense...how would you describe it?
Connor: I don't remember, but the pain suggests at one point i was mauled by Jesus
Alex: Duuude...that party was intense...how would you describe it?
Connor: I don't remember, but the pain suggests at one point i was mauled by Jesus
by bobbert the ghost eating toast August 18, 2011
A killer band duo consisting of two men (guitar, drums) who met in Basking Ridge, New Jersey during their sophomore year of high school. Name derived from the fact that both have the same first and middle names ("Jason" and "Charles," respectively). Notable performances include the Ridge High School Battle of the Bands '05 and other varied basement shows and gatherings. Irreverently referred to as "Jason Cookie" by some groups cautious to use the name of Jesus.
Recognized Hits:
1. "Todd" - JCP/JCS
2. "Elmo" - JCP/JCS
3. "Potato" - JCP/JCS
Recognized Hits:
1. "Todd" - JCP/JCS
2. "Elmo" - JCP/JCS
3. "Potato" - JCP/JCS
"YO!! Jesus Cookie rocked so hard last night that my face melted and I had to get reconstructive plastic surgery to look somewhat normal again!"
by Jason Charles Sobieski September 22, 2008
by [SWS]Daltor November 05, 2005
A mythological creature to whom is attributed power to redeem man from eternal damnation as a consequence of sin. Born of man's need to believe in something, Christ is a useful tool for many things: keeping the gullible in line, raising money, imposing morals on others, justifying war, bloodshed, and terrorism, explaining away tragedies like childhood cancer and natural disaster, silencing dissent, and imposing guilt, are among the most popular miracles performed by Jesus.
Christ retains a strong following thousands of years after his invention, despite the advance of science, education, and technology in the years since.
Christ retains a strong following thousands of years after his invention, despite the advance of science, education, and technology in the years since.
Jesus Christ, almighty son of God, has all power in heaven and earth, except the power to grow a money tree.
by runrobrun July 23, 2011
A Jesus version of a shark. Jesus walks on water, Jesus Shark walks on land.
Jesus made alot of fish and bread. Jesus shark makes people and bread.
Jesus was a person. Jesus shark is a cartoon.
Jesus got respect. Jesus shark has no respect. "nyuk nyuk nyuk."
remind you of anything? jesus shark is the big talking shark from josie and the pussycats.
Jesus made alot of fish and bread. Jesus shark makes people and bread.
Jesus was a person. Jesus shark is a cartoon.
Jesus got respect. Jesus shark has no respect. "nyuk nyuk nyuk."
remind you of anything? jesus shark is the big talking shark from josie and the pussycats.
"oh man tedd, I saw the Jesus Shark walk by me at the super market."
OR
"jesus shark watches me in the corner of my room when I sleep. fuckin jesus shark"
OR
"jesus shark watches me in the corner of my room when I sleep. fuckin jesus shark"
by ronnoc the axe September 26, 2008
Someone who is SO obsessed with Jesus, they will never see anything ever wrong with him, always love him. They will pressure you (annoyingly) about it constantly until you run away screaming.
Gotta kill them all!
Jesus freak: "God is real to you you shouldn't be fake to god he loves you."
John: "What? I was just standing here."
Jesus Freak: "God loves you."
John: "I'm not even religious!"
Jesus Freak: "You should be, Jesus loves you and is deep inside you soul."
John: "AHH SHUT THE HELL UP! YOUR CRAZY!" *runs away*
Jesus Freak: "He's going to hell :("
Jesus freak: "God is real to you you shouldn't be fake to god he loves you."
John: "What? I was just standing here."
Jesus Freak: "God loves you."
John: "I'm not even religious!"
Jesus Freak: "You should be, Jesus loves you and is deep inside you soul."
John: "AHH SHUT THE HELL UP! YOUR CRAZY!" *runs away*
Jesus Freak: "He's going to hell :("
by annoyedbyjesusfreaks July 08, 2011
Someone that is insanely good at CoD (Call of Duty). CoD is synonymous with MW2 (Modern Warfare 2). A CoD Jesus is a player usually very skilled and often accused of modding, hacking or cheating.
Synonym: Munk3yNuts1
Antonym: F Bobby
Synonym: Munk3yNuts1
Antonym: F Bobby
Random Player: "OMG that Munk3yNuts1 guy is a CoD Jesus, look at his K/D!!!"
F Bobby: "What about me?"
Random Guy: "Nah, you're negative, MunkeyNuts1 is a CoD Jesus"
F Bobby: "What about me?"
Random Guy: "Nah, you're negative, MunkeyNuts1 is a CoD Jesus"
by mynutsonyourface! February 24, 2010