Retractable Asshole

When someone tries to insult you, gets caught, then tries to play it off as if they were trying to laugh with you instead of at you.

Julie: "Hey, my pants just ripped, help me cover it please..."

Matt: "Hey, everyone, Julie's pants just ripped, you can see her bare ass!!"

Julie: "Why you gotta be a douchewad and broadcast it to everyone!?"

Matt: "Calm down, I was just joking.."

Julie: "Nice, you want to play Retractable Asshole card. Cool Talent, bro."

by Graphitestreak October 5, 2021

crunchy asshole

A nasty and abnormally crisp anus as a result of a variety of things (toilet paper, shit, hair, etc.). Use "crunchy asshole" when fuck just won't cut it.

You fucking crunchy asshole.
That shit's nastier than a crunchy asshole.
This is fucking worse than eating out a crunchy asshole.

by angryelephant March 5, 2019

narcastic asshole

Being all about yourself, while at the same time being an asshole.

“ God Johnny, your such an asshole! Why does everything have to be about you?!?you narcastic asshole!”

by Zig zags April 23, 2018

Living Asshole

The worst teacher in a certain subject at school.

Yo dude Mrs. Denny is the living asshole of the Spanish department.

by OG Hamslammer November 4, 2010

asshole magnet.

A person who possible suffer trauma and before they can recover is vampired on by winged monkeys for the puppet master asshole who then sends his cousin and cousins of evil to victimize feed off a blessed person to make them w whore or take them in control. someone who is unable heal by means of evil to be hit on by assholese who are need of someone out of thier leuge and damage as means for said asshole to not fix themself and abuse others.. for means and ways.. shes a sad and unwilling asshole magnet now.

The guy at the place trying to get into someone else space and mind fuck them is a complet edick whip. that girls trauma has made her a complete asshole magnet all over again. she is an asshole magnet.

by assole magnet November 23, 2020

Poke-Asshole

A person who plays Pokémon Go, usually while driving, with absolutely no regard for the safety of those around them.

That Poke-Asshole nearly ran me over!

by DEthington July 16, 2016

asshole stretch

Large object going in bum hole

Put your big penis in my bum hole and make my asshole stretch

Big asshole stretch

by Hokojpoli young 反而歐我 August 23, 2016