People on urban dictionary who put definitions for their friends' names in order to get attention from them
by Friendly Neighborhood Mosquito August 23, 2016
Get the Urban Assholes mug.When someone tries to insult you, gets caught, then tries to play it off as if they were trying to laugh with you instead of at you.
Julie: "Hey, my pants just ripped, help me cover it please..."
Matt: "Hey, everyone, Julie's pants just ripped, you can see her bare ass!!"
Julie: "Why you gotta be a douchewad and broadcast it to everyone!?"
Matt: "Calm down, I was just joking.."
Julie: "Nice, you want to play Retractable Asshole card. Cool Talent, bro."
Matt: "Hey, everyone, Julie's pants just ripped, you can see her bare ass!!"
Julie: "Why you gotta be a douchewad and broadcast it to everyone!?"
Matt: "Calm down, I was just joking.."
Julie: "Nice, you want to play Retractable Asshole card. Cool Talent, bro."
by Graphitestreak October 5, 2021
Get the Retractable Asshole mug.I was playing a solo round or disc golf yesterday behind a group of six that wouldn’t let me play through, so I scored an asshole-in-one off the tee pad to voice my displeasure.
I didn’t realize I was being a drunk and obnoxious asshole on the links yesterday, until a guy on the card behind me teed up an asshole-in-one on me.
I didn’t realize I was being a drunk and obnoxious asshole on the links yesterday, until a guy on the card behind me teed up an asshole-in-one on me.
by Cpl Schmuckatelli July 22, 2020
Get the Asshole-in-one mug.The tendency for meetings to go longer than necessary because participants feel the need to share their own opinions even though, typically, these opinions are not useful.
Origin: From "opinions are like assholes--everybody has one" and the asshole move of extending meetings longer than necessary.
Origin: From "opinions are like assholes--everybody has one" and the asshole move of extending meetings longer than necessary.
1. "UGH we could have ended the meeting a half hour early but there was MAJOR asshole effect going on today!"
2. "This is a nice report on our fourth quarter earnings. However, in your pie chart you use magenta and I think that crimson would be more pleasing to the eyes."
"You know, John, when this is printed out through the second floor copier, the color is always slightly different than what appears on screen."
"Hmm, is that so? Has Richard looked at that lately? Have we been sending out reports with the wrong color of crimson this whole time?"
"I think mauve would be a nice color. It was used on the quarter 3 report. It also matches nicely with our company's logo."
"How about colorblind people? Will this be a problem when they read the report?"
"Hmm, Chad, can you get us some numbers on how many potentially colorblind people will be reading this?"
"Ooh, we might also want to do a cost-benefit analysis of toner costs."
<sigh...>
2. "This is a nice report on our fourth quarter earnings. However, in your pie chart you use magenta and I think that crimson would be more pleasing to the eyes."
"You know, John, when this is printed out through the second floor copier, the color is always slightly different than what appears on screen."
"Hmm, is that so? Has Richard looked at that lately? Have we been sending out reports with the wrong color of crimson this whole time?"
"I think mauve would be a nice color. It was used on the quarter 3 report. It also matches nicely with our company's logo."
"How about colorblind people? Will this be a problem when they read the report?"
"Hmm, Chad, can you get us some numbers on how many potentially colorblind people will be reading this?"
"Ooh, we might also want to do a cost-benefit analysis of toner costs."
<sigh...>
by trevacious February 4, 2016
Get the asshole effect mug.N. A person who at a festive event, wedding, holiday, party, is is being an asshole, or just makes an ass out of themselves and ruins it for everybody.
The christmas party was awesome until Brad upper decked the bathroom and got us kicked out of the party, what a holiday asshole.
Somebody put xanax in the hunch-punch, what a holiday asshole.
He said he pulled out,what a holiday asshole.
I want to trade some of my .22 bullets for some .50 BMG, what a holiday asshole.
He dropped an X pill in the fishtank, what a holiday asshole.
That dock rat covered my shit in feta cheese, what a holiday asshole.
Somebody put xanax in the hunch-punch, what a holiday asshole.
He said he pulled out,what a holiday asshole.
I want to trade some of my .22 bullets for some .50 BMG, what a holiday asshole.
He dropped an X pill in the fishtank, what a holiday asshole.
That dock rat covered my shit in feta cheese, what a holiday asshole.
by Governor Captain Jack December 8, 2013
Get the holiday asshole mug.Asshole 9, when someone has done something that is described as a Jew out 9, they are an asshole 9, 9/10 on the asshole scale!
Matt: ‘Ash completely jewed me out today, he dropped me right in it.’
Liam: ‘that’s such a Jew out 9.’
Matt: ‘I know he’s an asshole 9.’
Liam: ‘that’s such a Jew out 9.’
Matt: ‘I know he’s an asshole 9.’
by Absoluteroaster69 April 24, 2020
Get the Asshole 9 mug.by scr3wcigs December 9, 2017
Get the caramel asshole mug.