Bisto Log

A long dark beefy coloured shit. Upon standing from its birthing, the smell immediately shoot’s up the nose and into the sinuses.

The highlight of Johnnie’s hangover was the birthing of a great bisto log.

by Beardedbutcher December 12, 2022

log squeeze

To extract poop from one’s anus, with force

I’ll have to call you back later. I’m mid log squeeze.

by VanillaThunder96 May 13, 2023

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log

A guy that really likes ham and Lincoln logs. He was a president, for some reason. He might have gone to a play to show the biggest Lincoln log tower and it not falling over, and putting ham sandwiches between each piece and eating the ham sandwiches without it falling over. Then, John Walks Booth said that Lincoln didn't go through the walking booth. So John Walks Booth assassinated him, making the tower fall.

Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: AND TODAY I WILL EAT THESE HAM SANDWICHES!!!
John Walks Booth: Wait a minute! You didn't get a Walking Ticket from the Walking Booth!
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: I-I don't need one if I'm on stag-
John Walks Booth: I don't wanna hear it! "pulls out his glock"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log: WAIT WAIT WAIT, NO WE CAN WORK THIS OUT!! I'LL GET A TICKE-"Gets shot"
Abra-Ham Lincoln Log after dead: Damn It, I was gonna get the world record for most sandwiches eaten between Lincoln logs.

by AStrunkMan69 July 4, 2022

tampon log

A log covered in used tampons and floppy dildos.

Man look at that tampon log

by kingmanthing November 14, 2016

Ants on a Log

When someone skeets on a turd. Looking similar to the childhood snack.

"I skeeted on the turd you left in the toilet, now my ants are on your log..."
"Have you ever jizzed on a turd? Thats called Ants on a log."

by HERR WyWy February 6, 2025

mob log

basically combat logging but instead caused by mobs

wow i am so pathetic i mob logged

by pepperppmaint June 8, 2022

Log Edging

1) Trying to shit yourself slowly.
2) A wooden style boundary system for a garden.

1) I was bored in the garden so I tried my hand at log edging. My wife was not very pleased with the final result.

by Happy Gardener March 19, 2025