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Griffin Porter

by killthemessenger1 January 9, 2010
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Fred Porter

Fred Porter is a large African-American male currently residing in Converse, Texas. Although he can bench press like 4 times the weight of an average adult woman and appears intimidating to the untrained eye, he is in fact sensitive and has many fears including scary bugs and making food choices when there is a limited amount of time to make them. Contrary to his main beliefs, he in fact does NOT make more money than his girlfriend (aka master) Madison AND his dog is LESS cool than hers.
Madison: "Rub my feet"

Fred Porter: "Yes, master"

I love you :)
by Madison is tha boss September 1, 2010
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grippin porcelain

Man John just downed 3 burgers and 4 shots of jack, he's probably in the bathroom grippin porcelain
by blaah123456789 July 7, 2011
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ghost portal

A gamer joke consisting of unexpected game sounds going off and on in your game play, preferably with a handheld.
Guy 1: I hear sounds in my game!
Guy 2: Yeah I get that often.
Guy 1: Did someone in this game open a ghost portal to the Netherworld? He needs to be killed right away!
by mineat August 14, 2012
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Playing Porter

When you either have magical body positioning that can impress even the greatest legends in your career field or when nobody sees you at work but you fill the blotter with outstanding work ethic that only a model SF Defender could accomplish.
Man it's cold out there. I'm just playing porter tonight.
by Thisoldog March 3, 2015
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gluteus portex

The red ring you get around your butt from sitting on the toilet too long
I sat on the toilet too long and now I have a gluteus portex.
by Cazon September 4, 2015
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Post Porcelain Porn Fountain

When sitting on the toilet, urinating skyward (as a reflex to the natural urge to pee after dropping a deuce) due to the boner obtained while watching porn.
John tagged himself with a golden stream in a post porcelain porn fountain after watching tranny hooker porn.
by StinkyZ May 24, 2016
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