masturbating

Having sex with your own hand or even using a fake dick (dildo) in the case of girls (or very messed up guys)... its very pathetic.

John is masturbating every night because he has no hope of ever having actual sex.

by CanHasHaxx February 5, 2009

ego masturbating

verb, intransitive The act of looking up oneself's first name on urbandictionary in an attempt to produce an ego high by reading the overflow of entries made by other people complementing their boyfriend or girlfriend. Those who exhibit this phenomenon typically have a forever alone relationship status, do not receive complements from family and friends, or, if done in the company of others, are being attention whores.

Olive: Hey look, guys! I looked up my name on urbandictionary, look at all the nice things people have said about me!

Joe: Shut the fuck up, you ego masturbating attention whore.

by didnotstealhisbike July 25, 2011

Maxturbating

The act of bringing about sexual gratification in oneself while being a man or woman called Max. Often done while looking in the yourself straight in the eyes in a mirror, while holding a picture of yourself in the "free" hand.

Max. Maaaaaax! We have to go, what are you still doing in front of the mirror. OMG?! Are you Maxturbating again? Disgusting!

by DutchHypeBeast June 12, 2018

Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Materbating

Having fun

I like Materbating with my friends.

by Black Lives matter57 June 28, 2021

Masturbating

What you were trying to do when your Mom caught you.

Chad were you masturbating?
No Mom my pants just slipped down and I was pulling them up!

by Squidbob October 12, 2021