Tear Jerker

A man who, while under the influence of alcohol or other mind-altering substances, masturbates and uses his tears as lubricant. A tear jerker may also be defined as a date or encounter with a woman which results in the afore mentioned definition.

This idea is referenced, but not directly named, in the popular film, "Waiting...".

A dialogue from the movie, "Waiting...".
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Dean: Calvin, what happens with every girl you're interested in? Nothing! You take them out, you pay for everything - you never make a move!

Monty: And then you go home... alone... to masturbate... while you cry... using your own tears as lubricant.

Calvin: Ok that was once... and I was drunk... and it was Valentine's Day.
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Calvin is a total tear jerker.

by joey x September 18, 2008

butt-jerker

another word for butt face

your boyfriend, tom andrascik, just punched me. he is such a butt-jerker

by phin tap May 11, 2009

jerker

London term for a knife

"Pulled out me jerker and striped his boat race"

by waller February 28, 2008

turd jerker

Beings which employ fecal matter in order to effectuate a motion in such a manner that it simulates the act of masturbation on their genitailiæ in expectation of bringing to pass orgasm.

you are a turd jerker

by F.D.L.K December 29, 2009

tear jerker

Someone who listens to Andrea Bocelli's "Time to Say Goodbye" while knocking one out.

It was a rainy Friday night, I was depressed, I spanked my hog while listening to some Bocelli, I'm such a tear jerker.

by Red Face December 2, 2007

jack jerker

a guy who masterbates

yo i need to beat my meat

well then you are a jack jerker

by youalreadyknowdawg October 24, 2009

Turkey Jerker

jerkin off and then cummin on urself and rubbin the cum on u and then guys lick it off as they are jerking off n than cummin on the person they licked it off of.

Lucia told us he turkey jerked last night. we we're so disgusted.

by SuperDawg!!! December 2, 2004