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Goonerism

A soul-crushing, dignity-vaporizing descent into hentai-fueled oblivion, where every shred of self-respect, ambition, and human potential is violently sacrificed at the altar of endless, wrist-snapping depravity. A gooner, once a functioning person, devolves into a dopamine-addicted troglodyte, eyes sunken, skin pale, body frail—marinating in the warm glow of their screen as they edge closer and closer to complete neurological collapse. Conversations? Forgotten. Dreams? Replaced with AI-generated waifus who wouldn't acknowledge their existence even if coded to. Relationships? Nonexistent—unless you count the parasocial bonds they've formed with fictional characters and cam models who milk them like brain-dead cattle. The peak of their life is a pixelated orgasm, followed by an existential horror so deep it could make Lovecraft weep. Goonerism isn’t just a habit—it’s a one-way ticket to being a functionally extinct human being.
"Once a promising young man with dreams and ambition, Jake succumbed to full-blown goonerism, wasting away in the dim glow of his monitor, his only accomplishments being a collection of cursed bookmarks, a wrist that could arm-wrestle God, and a level of self-loathing so deep it could be measured in fathoms."
by N0rs3GOd March 14, 2025
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Henri Gooner

The act of two females scissoring each other but forget to lube up but realize they don't have to because they are females.
I accidentally did a Henri Gooner with my roommate. I'm so stupid.
by George Corn October 19, 2025
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Goonerization

The trend of gatcha games by and large to use female characters as sexual objects in order to generate sales to sustain the game, as without them, they wouldn't have a viable business model. Similar to how crabs have evolved independently multiple times across the world, gatcha games feature a variety of sexual exploitation to pry money from the hands of gamers. It is well documented that male characters are widely unpopular in these type of games.
"All gatcha games must undergo goonerization in order to financially survive."
by Mahjongleur July 16, 2025
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Gooneral

Nautica Malone, an executive in the Gooning committee, who tragically passed away from goonicide.
"Rest in peace, the Gooneral."
"I CAN'T GOON! I CAN'T GOON!"
"May he goon in peace."
by blushywushy February 3, 2025
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goonerator

the thing that makes you goon; a generator for gooning
"turning on your goonerator!"
by rubystones October 5, 2025
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The Gooner

A person characterized by her laziness and masturbation addiction. It is a femboy and seeks attention from women through chastity. It enjoys sucking Tim's cock. For an example look up: Valentin Knorr.
you`re not a Gooner,.. you`re the Gooner. Fuck you, you piece of shit
by vALENTIN hATER March 22, 2025
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Gooner

What a Spud would be if they could ever grow up and get some self esteem and class. A Gooner is a supporter of the best team in North London and a club with real history and class.
One Spud to another: I wonder what it would be like to support a club that actually had an illustrious history and a chance of winning things!

Other Spud: That's a scary thought, I wouldn't know how to react. I think I'd rather keep supporting Spurs, at least I know I am really good at being disappointed. I wouldn't even begin to know how to be a Gooner!
First Spud: I feel the same way. Happy St. Totteringham's Day!!!
by Moscow Blues July 27, 2022
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