The act of masturbating at your desk when nobody is around; masturbation after everyone has left work for the day. Excrements are usually caught by a fast-food napkin or nearby trash can.
by heavyburtation April 27, 2011
Get the desk jerkmug. happens during school when a student is napping in class but can still hear the teacher talking. Hence dreaming what the teacher is lecturing about
by 54763875639464 November 15, 2010
Get the Desk Nappingmug. The fat, frumpy, lonely woman who works the front desk at most medical or dental offices whose sole purpose is to keep sales people from accessing the decision-maker. This woman despises anyone who’s thin enough to see their own feet and dresses in only the finest fashions from Dress Barn, Lane Bryant or Torrid. To say she’s plus sized would be like saying Lizzo suffers from anorexia.
The savvy sales professional knows the weakness of the desk pig.. which is food and candy. She is powerless against the sacred aroma of a Panera Pick Three and will melt in your hands if you get her the Cream of Broccoli soup and her own dozen of Krispy Creams.
She doesn’t wear a name tag but you can be certain that her name is Kathleen, Cindy, Sandy, and of course Karen. Beware of her powerful ability to rudely look past your well tailored dress clothes and obvious college degree, Thea etchings don’t impress her. The only conversation she will engage in will be centered around where lunch is coming from or when the next Magic Mike movie is coming out. Never try to discuss business, the weather or exercise with the Desk Pig. 🐷
Assume the desk pig has at least 4 children, is divorced or was never married, lives in subsidized housing, and has at least one butterfly tattoo on her kankle or her wrist with some type of motto like “Live free or Die” or “ Burger King next Exit.”
The savvy sales professional knows the weakness of the desk pig.. which is food and candy. She is powerless against the sacred aroma of a Panera Pick Three and will melt in your hands if you get her the Cream of Broccoli soup and her own dozen of Krispy Creams.
She doesn’t wear a name tag but you can be certain that her name is Kathleen, Cindy, Sandy, and of course Karen. Beware of her powerful ability to rudely look past your well tailored dress clothes and obvious college degree, Thea etchings don’t impress her. The only conversation she will engage in will be centered around where lunch is coming from or when the next Magic Mike movie is coming out. Never try to discuss business, the weather or exercise with the Desk Pig. 🐷
Assume the desk pig has at least 4 children, is divorced or was never married, lives in subsidized housing, and has at least one butterfly tattoo on her kankle or her wrist with some type of motto like “Live free or Die” or “ Burger King next Exit.”
Hey Craig, I called on Dr X’s Endo practice today for the 17th time but that goddamn desk pig is a relentlessly mean and nasty whore who’s already consumes my entire annual lunch budget. What do I do to get past her and sell a system? I’m trying to save teeth and improve lives out here but this beast is a real air thief!
by BizarreRideonTheFarSide April 20, 2023
Get the desk pigmug. Guy: Man, all this homework is killing me. I need a stress reliever, but I don't have any time.
Girl: Hmm, I can fix that problem.
Guy: Really? How so?
(girl kneels down)
Girl: Just keep doing your work.
(girl performs blowjob)
Guy: Thanks for the desk dome!!
Girl: Hmm, I can fix that problem.
Guy: Really? How so?
(girl kneels down)
Girl: Just keep doing your work.
(girl performs blowjob)
Guy: Thanks for the desk dome!!
by gatordomelover September 23, 2010
Get the Desk Domemug. by Randirt February 9, 2018
Get the Desk squeezermug. The act of several people taking turns sitting their bare anuses onto a bound individual, forcing them to perform analingus on the participants who take turns on them. Commonly played game in the BDSM and gay leather community.
"At the International Mr Leather convention last year, there was a competitive "Hot Desking" event. Pig Marco won first place after successfully sticking his tongue into the most anuses in under a minute"
"The gang bang only got interesting when they hot desked that whore for an entire hour before she got lockjaw and tapped out"
"The gang bang only got interesting when they hot desked that whore for an entire hour before she got lockjaw and tapped out"
by Rox My Box January 29, 2019
Get the Hot Deskingmug. Man 1: "What's John doing?"
Man 2: "Clearly, by the noises being emmited from his office, John is giving his desk a haircut..."
Man 2: "Clearly, by the noises being emmited from his office, John is giving his desk a haircut..."
by Brinda Filangi September 7, 2005
Get the Desk Haircutmug.