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bagpipe check

a manual examination of one's wedding tackle, typically performed by reaching underneath one's kilt to ensure that all equipment is in proper working order.
After our grueling and miserable traverse of Stac Pollaidh, my sweat-drenched nether regions were well past due for a bagpipe check.
by kilt_lifter March 8, 2022
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crippled bagpipe

When you're fucking a girl in the ass and you wrap your arms around her stomach and squeeze, causing her to fart on your dick.
Jenny wouldn't let me try the crippled bagpipe last night because we had Mexican for dinner and she was afraid she'd shit all over my dick.
by massterblaster December 16, 2013
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Scottish bagpipe

The act of connecting one's rectum to another's usually performed with a cylindrical tube or rod to help regulate internal body temperatures by sharing flatulence. The bagpipe definition was derived a Scotsman the that had climbed Mount Everest and survived using his quick wits bagpipe and young squire.
Did you hear Rodger and Mick Finney had to play the Scottish bagpipe to escape the avalanche?!

Also accepted the abbreviation of the term "The pipes"

Jesus Johnny if it gets any colder out here we're going to have to play the pipes.
by 2ub0 November 4, 2019
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sputtering bagpipe

When your female or male partner is giving you fellatio on the bed at a 90 degree angle and his/her arm pushes on your stomach so much that you flatulate.
I found a girl on tinder and she turned me into a sputtering bagpipe, on a Tuesday afternoon.
by Shutteringbagpipe April 29, 2023
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Mexican Bagpipe

When one blows air into a womans vagina and then uses his or her hands to push down on the lower stomach, pushing the air back out of her vagina, creating natural vaginal flatunlence.
Dude, you had to hear the Mexican Bagpipe I gave this girl last night, It sounded like his ass after buffalo chicken pizza!
by A Knowledgeable Mexican August 2, 2012
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bag pipes

An Spanish instrument of torture which caught on in Scotland. The torturer dresses up in a ceremonial skirt and a puts on the hat made out of womens beaver hairs.
Then a small kitten is inserted into a tartan coloured bag and squeezed to death while the torturer blows air into the bag so we hear the amplified screams of the kitten
Gordon, will ya load up the bag pipes with 4 or 5 kittens and I'll show ye a new party trick - I made up a tune called "Amazing Grace"
by dick the perv January 31, 2008
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Egyptian Bagpipe

A variation of the typical "bagpipe" however instead of using the armpit you use the back of the knee for sexual gratification.
I asked if she wanted to do the egyptian bagpipe but then i realized we couldn't because she was a double leg amputee.
by Austin R & J Karr May 17, 2007
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