Mommy Blindness

When people tell you shit your kids/pets/friends did/are, but your brain just can't register it cause you think they're perfect no matter what

Person1: I'm sorry, but your son is very overweight
Person 2: No he's not! He's just a little chubby!
Person 1: You need to snap out of the mommy blindness

by NuclearKärring November 29, 2017

Pattern blindness

An effect caused by staring at something for so long that the person's vision becomes warped or distorted

"I stared at a wall for so long I got pattern blindness." (not a real quote)

by You'renotauthorizedtobehere April 30, 2025

clutter blindness

A condition that occurs as a result of living in and around so much miscellaneous debris and detritus (AKA clutter), that it becomes impossible to see the object you’re looking for. Symptoms are exacerbated when said object is nestled in the mess, right in front of your face. The worst symptoms of clutter blindness seem to peak when the missing object is small, easily recognizable, of great value and/or importance, especially when you could swear to Christ you just had the goddamned thing a second ago.

wanted to go out with you guys really badly, but I spent the whole weekend suffering from clutter blindness. I was searching for my grandmother’s engagement ring, which is very valuable, shiny, important, and I desperately needed to find so I could propose to Jennifer. Luckily the clutter blindness briefly lifted after a week of searching and I was able to see that it had been on my coffee table the entire time, nestled amidst a collection of Snapple and 2-liter bottle caps, various writing utensils, two full dinner services worth of flatware, and the two sets of keys I already lost this year the exact same way, and which yes, I was coincidentally looking for! Thank you so much for asking!

by RedesignThePinecones July 26, 2021

blind bitch

A blind bitch is a person who doesn't see things mentally.

Note:
This has nothing to do with your actual vision ~(20/20)~

"Dan Howell is a blind bitch, he couldn't see that Phil Lester had a thing for him."
"Robert Downey is such blind bitch, Tom Holland should find someone who knows how to flirt"

by ToastedNuggets June 4, 2018

Dick Blind

To be "Dick Blind" is to be completely oblivious as to how truly horrible someone is because you want to have sex with them.

Dick Blindness can be seen in most attack simps that are found on the internet, but especially on Twitter/X

Richard can't see how much of a bitch Linda is being because the silly old fool has gone dick blind

by CassieWin November 12, 2023

blind charity

Giving money to people you don't know, for a cause that probably doesn't exist.

I.e. "Help me save my dog," "I need money for gas," "My child is in the hospital"

Random Stranger: "My child is in the hospital, please help me raise money for him/her"
Me: "Have any pictures of this child?"
Stranger: "Not on me"
Me: "Right... I'm not one for blind charity"

by johnydelux1 May 20, 2018

Blind lizard

A chick who is fucking one of the duck hunters in the duck blind

Sally is a blind lizard yea she fucks Matt because he's a duck hunter

by Matterlizard September 14, 2025