jeans boner

When your jeans wrinkle up to make it look like you have a hard-on. Normally when sitting.

"Hay guys, Steve has a boner!"
"Very funny guys, its just a jeans boner"

by TheHastieLanyon June 4, 2014

inverse boner

When something is so nasty or such a large turn-off that it makes you feel as if your junk is shriveling up into nothing and all your hormones are dying.

Matt: Dude did you see Mackenzie's mom over there trying to dance?

David: Ya, it gave me an inverse boner.

by itsnotc September 27, 2010

boner jams

a collection of various porn scenes on a dvd or cd rom.

"I just made a boner jams that I can watch while on the plane to go to a business meeting."

by bobfuckupamust March 9, 2010

Food Boner

To enjoy a meal that is so delicious it stimulates your sexual organs thus resulting in a food boner.

My dick hurts today from the massive food boner that steak gave me last night.

Patricia ate one of my bagels I brought home from Manhattan and I could see her leaking from her pants, total food boner bro.

by Dommyb11 June 10, 2011

phantom boner

When the penis becomes erect but you can not for the life of you think why the blood is rushing to your phallus, then you are in possession of a phantom boner. It has no reason to be there, just like Hitler at a Bahmitzvah, It just shouldnt be there.

You are in church singing a glorious hymn, but why oh why are you pointing to the heavens? The phantom boner has taken over and wont go away for at least half an hour

by Keithmorreason November 16, 2009

pro-boner

When a prostitute gives their service for free.

If you're hot enough, maybe that prostitute will give it to you pro-boner.

by Bobojoe December 19, 2010

Scrooge Boner

An erection one gets during the holidays.

"Watching my cousin signing Christmas carols gave me a huge scrooge boner."

by This is not Brendan January 1, 2010