Therapy Session for Blind Squirrels

Therapy session for blind squirrels: a group of people who know nothing talking to each other with the hope of learning something.

Trying to learn how to use a computer program from a forum on the internet is like a therapy session for blind squirrels.

by Miles Bighorse June 10, 2018

The Great Squirrel Stampede of 1822

In the years prior to 1822, squirrels were really busy fornicating and doing experimental drugs. This was a time that can roughly be equated to the 60's in America. Well-fare was none existent in that time and the squirrels had so many bastard babies that they couldn't feed them all. The squirrels, after realizing their mistake, took to the streets and overwhelmed the cities. People were mauled and clawed to death to sate the needs of the squirrel population. Upon receiving the news, the U.N. convened, formed a plan and developed an experimental new weapon. Taking back key areas and using the newly developed Shotgun, humans were able to turn the tide and restore the squirrel population to defeatable numbers. A treaty was signed in the year 1823, but the effects of The Great Squirrel Stampede are still felt today.

"Dad, is it true that some men had their nuts gnawed off during The Great Squirrel Stampede of 1822?"

"Get the shotgun, Jimmy! Those squirrely fucks are stampeding again! I hope it's not a repeat of The Great Squirrel Stampede of 1822."

by ChodeRash January 14, 2015

beat in the butt with a wet squirrel

euphemism for exhausted, tired on every level, as beaten down as one can be. Origin: Dobbins Family saying created by Hale Dobbins, deceased, of Arkansas

as in "I'm so tired I feel like I've been beat in the butt with a wet squirrel."

by H. Hendrix Dobbins November 14, 2013

New Mexico Squirrel Chirp

When you're eating her box and she vibrates a fart on your chin

"I was eating her pussy and she hit me with a New Mexico Squirrel Chirp."

by Evil Jokester October 19, 2019

Lemme pet your squirrel

'Lemme pet your squirrel' is meant to say to someone who has an attractive moustache, and you just want to touch it. Preferably, pet it. Also, it is as bushy or curly as a squirrel's tail.

As I saw John's moustache, all I thought was "Lemme pet your squirrel".

by glizzydilf July 31, 2015

kissing squirrel brains

while holding your balls, squezzing tightly and pressing to someone cheek

roland past out travis made him kissing squirrel brains

by specialist69 April 23, 2011

secret agent squirrel

greasy headed loser. one whom enjoys sitting on his own thumb.

tom is such a secret agent squirrel

by fish stick 123456 April 30, 2007