scottish bagpipe

When a woman proceeds to sit on your face, and then queefs in your mouth, thus sucking air from her pussy. your cheeks blow up like you are inhaling on a scottish bagpipe, and then you blow out your own tune.

I was eatin' my chick out when she scottish bagpiped the shit outta me. i puked immiediatley.

by realnice6969696 December 20, 2008

Scottish Restaurant

McDonald's.

Also Scottish Food, Scottish Cuisine.

If I eat at the Scottish Restaurant again, I'll get McSick!

by evildave August 20, 2011

Scottish Moustache

refers to the bloody residue gathered above ones upper lip after having performed cunnilinigus on a woman during her menstrual cycle.

"Hey Jordan, what's up with your lip, bro? Did you cut yourself?"

"Nah, just haven't washed off the Scottish Moustache Sarah

gave me last night. She's still on her period."

"That's just plain f*uckin' gross."

by relaxfrancis October 15, 2009

Scottish egg

The act of striking a woman's breasts with a wicker basket in order to produce a tartan pattern, as on a Scottish kilt.

"honey, if you don't shut that god damned mouth, I am going to give you a few Scottish eggs!"

"I met this girl last night who begged me to give her a Scottish egg!"

by giverofscottisheggs February 4, 2009

Scottish Driver

The act of taking golf club (preferably a driver), gaining an erection, lifting one's kilt and sticking in your anal cavity. Then using your dick as a joystick to aim the golf club and tee-off.

At the driving range yesterday, Johnson pulled a Scottish Driver on us.

by Sinh November 10, 2015

scottish oven

The act of trapping a friend or partner under the sheets and then farting so hard you shit yourself, creating an odor so foul it could kill an ogre.

Greg: What did you and Jen do last night?
Bob: Oh, we watched a movie, had some popcorn and then I Scottish ovened her so hard it would make Shrek proud.

Greg: Nice!

by Jace Narcast April 13, 2016

scottish wallet

A wallet that magically disappears when the bill is due.
Colloquial Phrase - Americana Vernacular

Waiter: Here's your check.
Patron 1: 26.50, guess that'll be 13.25 a pi...
Patron 2: ...Sorry number one, I forgot my wallet @ home.
Patron 1: You have such a Scottish wallet...

by Big Bil O January 29, 2017