Crypt Keeper

The host of Tales From The Crypt, and an icon to methheads everywhere.

I had to go to Wal-Mart, unfortunately, and I saw three burnt-out motherfuckers who look like they could be the Crypt Keeper's cousins.

by MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA September 19, 2009

Crapitalism

Economic system that's doomed to abolish itself by its very nature. Forms a Darwinian free market in which monetary profit is the only objective. In essence: modern slavery.

Unscrupulous competition is the main drive behind said accumulation of money in which some will inevitably lose. Vital technological progress is accelerated and being utilized to increasingly replace human workers in order to cut the costs and maximize profits.

In this last stage, the bulk of the population for which those goods and services should have been produced in the first place is left on the streets without income and thus cannot purchase any of them. It's the war of everyone against everyone, in a battlefield of abundance. Finally, the system implodes.

Instead of taking advantage of technological progress, that could free everyone from the necessity to work, and reform the money system by granting everyone a basic income, or issue a new currency every year where all excess money not spend is deleted from the system - or by removing money altogether and let personal nano-factories provide all the things one needs - politicians and other influential mouthpieces, who have more than enough wealth, demand even more jobs.

This only shows that a crapitalist economy is not beneficial for humans in any way, as it does not serve humanity but rather that humanity serves a blind, abstract monster.

"They still believe that crapitalism is the zenith of human evolution."

by Anony-Mouse0202 November 14, 2012

cryptic

1. hidden meanings
2. women

"my girfriend was being so cryptic"

by lindsay s July 2, 2006

cryptkids

a group of gay af friends who are actual cryptids

jmb: woah look it's the cryptkids!!
tyler: wow i love them so much omg

by nessie the blackmailer October 6, 2018

crypto-hooker

Phrase coined by Tucker Carlson to apparently mean someone who claims to be a stripper but is in reality a prostitute. According to Mr. Carlson it can be assumed that all strippers are in fact crypto-hookers. Also, according to his legal scholarship, such individuals offer less reliable evidence in courts of law and thus testimony from them should not be taken seriously even though they are under oath.

Tucker Carlson asserted that the testimony of a woman allegedly raped at an off-campus party hosted by members of the Duke University men's lacrosse team "is to be taken ... a little differently" from that of "an ordinary person" because she is "a crypto-hooker" who "hires herself out to dance naked in front of and ... sometimes sleep with ... strangers." From Media Matters

by daiglo May 5, 2006

Crapity

A term used to define something you did wrong whilst alone

"flushed the bird down the toilet, Crapity"

by name1 January 8, 2009

crypt the warchild

Underground MC from the group Outerspace and part of Army Of The Pharaohs. he's absolutely untouchable and a real ass muthafucka! Too important to explain on here... Just look him up and be in awe!!!!!

Crypt The Warchild,"Don’t hit me with the drama, don’t approach me ’bout no B.I
Cause I’m a Pharaoh king, and y’all ain’t worthy of a reply
Bodies I’ve caught decomposing on the seaside
Catch me river dancing through the bloody waters, knee-high
Mind state is cut throat, can’t walk around deprived
My team shut it down, and they access will be denied
Crown royal status Puerto-Ricans, that’s how we ride
Nocturnal foes mesmerized by the streetlights
One shot at glory, game will never give you three tries
For the haters I’ve murked, they would love to see me die
Acid tripping vision, everything look hi-defy
Drugs, money, liquor, only things that get me by!"

by UrbanGorilla303 February 8, 2015