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couldn't organise a killing in a slaughterhouse

Rather similar to the phrase 'Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery' though used in even less amusing and more wearisome circumstances. Generally used to describe management or any cack-handed effort at leadership when the job ought to be easy for a small subnormal child to do, particularly in an actual slaughterhouse, where everything breaks down constantly. Or livestock never turns up and everyone waits relentlessly.
Not a funny phrase, just sad.
The job is fucked (has gone to shit) as usual. Whist observing a manager running arround like a blue arsed fly, utterly devoid of any intellegent suggestion or decision and with an impending audit looming:
Employee 1:"bloody hopeless this lot"
Employee 2: "aye man, couldn't organise a killing in a slaughterhouse"
both laugh mirthlessly and each simultaniously though secretly wonder what their lives are about.
by 2bilious January 11, 2012
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couldnt score in a brothel

First coined to define a bunch of amateur footballers who couldn’t find the back of net . In particular Papanui Redwood Pirates.
Originally from the Welsh “ Ni allai arsenal yn sgorio mewn puteindy “
They missed so many 1v1 that they couldnt score in a brothel
by Bigneck August 18, 2018
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Couldn’t find you!

When you wake up from sleep & your loved one is not there! You search for them and cannot find them.
I became sad when I couldn’t find you!
by TheBlueLeo April 20, 2019
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Couldn't play a Note to save their strote

When someone can't play an instrument, then starts jamming random notes and they sound terrible
Wow this guy couldn't play a Note to save their strote
by S Shadic April 4, 2020
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Couldn’t be holed

Couldn’t be bother. Too lazy.
Could you go to the shop and get some milk? No way, I couldn’t be holed
by Same town August 1, 2020
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caulden

an angel from heaven itself.
I’m in love with you, caulden.”
by bongbinary November 25, 2021
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Colden

Colden’s a bitch
by Oldpeoplesballs February 27, 2022
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