Musket Ball

A musket ball is a small lead ball fired from a primitive gun called a musket and is quite possibly the deadliest fucking thing known to mankind. These little killers are FAR larger than a modern military round (the caliber of 5.56 NATO is .22 while the caliber of a Brown Bess musket is FUCKING .75). If you compare being shot by a modern rifle to being stabbed by a knife, then bring hit by a musket ball is being stabbed by a fucking fist. What makes these little fucking murderers so deadly are the fact that they are large and slow projectiles, like a small cannon. Records from the American Civil War show limbs that have been blown clean off from the torso and exit wounds the size of grapefruits. Possibly the most brutal and badass innovation of warfare ever designed (as long as you don't get hit by one).

Continental Army Soldier #1: Holy shit, Ben was shot by a musket ball!
Continental Army Soldier #2: Where'd his fucking head go?

by SteveHarvYeet April 17, 2019

Slop Musket

It’s when one rips one’s dick off in one fell swoop.

Man, I was jacking off so hard last night I gave myself a slop musket.

by Sloppy Tamali June 14, 2020

ass musketeer

An inconsiderate shitbag. Someone who champions the cause of dicking other people over or fucking with their otherwise well-meaning lives.

Did you see that fucking ass musketeer cut me off?

by acceljunky June 6, 2011

Loading the Musket

The act of trying to put ones semen back into one's self after ejaculating to something they are ashamed of.

After cumming to a picture of Nicholas Cage, Sam was seen loading the musket.

by jdodds January 20, 2015

wooly musket

While someone is sleeping, squat over their face with your butt cheeks spread and fart.

That bastard gave me a wooly musket, and I think he sharted a little!

by Its The Sean October 12, 2005

Loading the Musket

The coital act of a penis pounding a forgotten tampon deep into the female vagina.

I had no idea I was loading the musket. That whore! The ensuing infection will surly cost her!

by Phondooky April 25, 2006

Elongated Musket

A man-child who throws a hissy fit when people don't agree with him or do things his way. Examples of such behaviour include: randomly calling heroes pedophiles on twitter, firing people who know crap tons better than his pea-brain, and lying about funding secured. Ironically only wants to screw girls who are half his own age.

Ay man, you heard what that Tesla CEO did today?
Nah, what did that bloody Elongated Musket do this time?

by thelegendofsql September 1, 2018