Rules of Lingerie Shopping

1. Check the dirty laundry. While you woman is in the shower, check her bra and panty size. Nothing ruins a sexy gift of lingerie quicker than buying her something two sizes too big. No matter how good she looks, she's self concious about her figure.
2. You are not shopping for Heidi Klum. Be realistic about your selection of lingerie. Buy something appropriate to your woman's body type. Does she have a baby belly, and an awesome rack? Shop a baby doll which draws the eyes to the cleavage, and covers the belly. That corset may look hot on some 90lb boob jobbed model, but your woman will hate it. She may actually want to draw a breath at some point in the evening.
3. Don't be shy. When you are at the lingerie store, get one of the ladies to help you. Now don't be a creep about this, but try to pick out a sales lady with your lady's body type. Give her your woman's measurments early, and she can lead you to something appropriate.
And again, don't be a creep. Keep your eyes on the task.
4. KISS Keep It Simple, Stupid. Think of lingerie as gift wrapping. You want easy access. You do not want to be fighting with a half dozen doubleback hooks, behind her back, while in the throes of passion. A drawstring at the cleavage is perfect. Fun and easy to reveal the prize inside.
5. Complete the package. So you've got some lingerie she will look hot in. Does it need stockings? Again, consult with the sales lady. Buy her favorite wine, or choclate covered strawberries.

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by The Jerkman December 28, 2011

Lingerlingus

Pronounced "LAHN-ger-LING-us." The act of removing one's partner's undergarments with one's mouth.

According to a witness at the scene, the victim was engaged in an act of lingerlingus when he inadvertently swallowed a bra hook and subsequently expired.

by gartholomew March 7, 2011

Liander

A statement that is not a lie but does meander around the truth. A fact that omits the full story.

I asked my bae about last Saturday night and I think she told me a liander.

by Homer Bedlow September 20, 2017

linnerinks

A combination of meeting for a late lunch, and early dinner, with alcoholic beverages. Usually resulting in a full day of drunken debauchery.

I met my friend Michelle for linnerinks at 3pm on Thursday. We drank until 4am on Friday, and forgot to eat.

by 542$ September 10, 2019

Lindell3x

Lindell is the most beautiful boy that’s a playa he love girls and taking them on a date

Lindell3x is so savage

by Lindell3x November 23, 2021

Room Linger

The act of eating a lot of fiber, then later during the night when all of the food is digested, your ass starts to rip farts out without you noticing, then once you leave the room after about 30 mins from constant ass ripping and you walk back in, you get a nose bleed from all the toxic build up being released into your face (may burn eyebrows)

DAMN! dude that Room Linger of yours just about made me die, calm down on the beans

by MSMA October 26, 2011

Mo-linger

When a man's movember or prostasche lingers on into December because he is starting to like it.

Usually these people are single or headstrong, as many spouses don't like molingus.

Matt: You didn't shave?

Mike: I'm liking my movember.

Matt: We're in December, dude. Now its a mo-linger.

by Zarbuck December 1, 2010