A person obsessed with making organic fruit juice to sell at stands near children's schools. He spends hours obsessively manufacturing sweet fruit juices, in order to get the little kids hooked on it, so he can make money to support his religious causes.
How does Jimmy contribute so much to our church? Didn't you hear? He's a Jesus Juicer.
"Mommy, why does that guy always sell juice at that stand near out school?" "Darling, you stay away from him! He's a bad Jesus Juicer".
"Mommy, why does that guy always sell juice at that stand near out school?" "Darling, you stay away from him! He's a bad Jesus Juicer".
by SultrySloth April 23, 2019
n. Colloquial, Possibly Australian
See also oh shit bar
Found in automobiles, but appear to serve no purpose other than
a) assisting corpulent persons and/or people to alight the vehicle
b) grabbing on to in times of a potential accident to brace oneself, i.e driver exceeding the speed limit
So called for one of two reasons
i) person grabbing the 'brace' praying to their respective deity to avoid the accident, being an english term this is most likely to be a christian, hence use of 'Jesus'
ii) person audibly exclaiming 'Jesus!'in the same situation as above
In absence of a bar, may also be referred to as a 'Jesus Strap'
See also oh shit bar
Found in automobiles, but appear to serve no purpose other than
a) assisting corpulent persons and/or people to alight the vehicle
b) grabbing on to in times of a potential accident to brace oneself, i.e driver exceeding the speed limit
So called for one of two reasons
i) person grabbing the 'brace' praying to their respective deity to avoid the accident, being an english term this is most likely to be a christian, hence use of 'Jesus'
ii) person audibly exclaiming 'Jesus!'in the same situation as above
In absence of a bar, may also be referred to as a 'Jesus Strap'
by andrewfx51 April 03, 2009
A driver (male/female) known to ALWAYS allow others the right-of-way, often causing his/her passengers to become angry at them for being overly nice to any and all traffic.
Dan: "Dude, your dad is always letting other people go first, even when it's HIS turn. No wonder we're always late.."
Chris:"I know man, he's a total traffic jesus."
Chris:"I know man, he's a total traffic jesus."
by SeñorFrog January 24, 2017
Cletus - Wesley, did ya remember to pick up that case of PBR and the mountain dew?
Wesley - Hell yeah, I'm always wearing my Jesus Antlers.
Wesley - Hell yeah, I'm always wearing my Jesus Antlers.
by Batdad Merla February 18, 2013
An ethereal being, If you find a hot gay being, There is a chance that they are Lesbian Jesus. They lord over and watch over gays. You will know you have met Lesbian Jesus if they bless your fucking soul by saying "Gay gay homosexual gay." NOT ALL GAYS ARE LESBIAN JESUS.
by Lesbianjesusfolower#582 June 28, 2023
Fuck , did you see Rihanna sucking Charlie Sheens cock on the porcelain jesus? Dude got a blumpkin! LEGENDARY!
by PattyCakes January 14, 2018
"It's not devils lettuce, it's jesus cabbage
by Pretty.odd.stan July 31, 2017