When you look alarmingly like an angry, ocularly-challenged, German Shepherd owning bull dyke, and always keep a button in your pocket due to the incessant issue of having to close the rear holes in your pants after you "HAD to stop at THAT out of service, poorly-lit wayside" for HOURS, you're probably familiar with The Hairy Knuckle Werthers:
This is when your favorite boy-crush takes a plaster mold of the hand of the angriest, most extravagantly endowed gorilla at the zoo, and proceeds to fill it with liquified Werther's candy.
Upon hardening (of the candy), your boy crush thrusts the giant black hand-fist into your spelunking tunnel (Most of the other people at The Hardee's Play place pretend not to notice).
Upon germination, you grant your boy crush with a button you've kept in your pocket for years. Quietly exclaiming, "That was better than the time I walked Lassie"
This is when your favorite boy-crush takes a plaster mold of the hand of the angriest, most extravagantly endowed gorilla at the zoo, and proceeds to fill it with liquified Werther's candy.
Upon hardening (of the candy), your boy crush thrusts the giant black hand-fist into your spelunking tunnel (Most of the other people at The Hardee's Play place pretend not to notice).
Upon germination, you grant your boy crush with a button you've kept in your pocket for years. Quietly exclaiming, "That was better than the time I walked Lassie"
Once Rock Day was done, the spastic guy Tom is all side and told us when Gary got "The Hairy Knuckle Werther's"
by Sweaty Shirt Changer June 21, 2023
Get the The Hairy Knuckle Werther'smug. Hairy needles is when your pubic hair gets caught in the foreskin of your penis causing your '3 millimeter defeater' to be in a state of uncomfortable cock torture.
Usually a sign that you should shave your pubes.
Usually a sign that you should shave your pubes.
Homie1: Bro, is anyone coming, i need to sort out my 'hairy needles'
Homie2: your good feller, ill tell you if anyone's coming
Homie3: i hate 'hairy needles', its super uncomfortable.
Homie2: your good feller, ill tell you if anyone's coming
Homie3: i hate 'hairy needles', its super uncomfortable.
by xXFurryNazi69420Xx October 28, 2021
Get the Hairy needlesmug. The act of freaking out. Its a shitfit but a bit worse because its more of a hairy situation that can't be controlled.
by jimmybomm August 9, 2020
Get the hairy shitfitmug. A lot of people may wonder if Harris Teeters (AKA Hairy Teeters, Hairy Teeth (Hairy Teethers) or Even a Hairy Tooth (Hairy Toothers) are the same things as Hairy Deuters (Thou Shalt Not Deuteronomy), Dairy Hooters (AKA Dairy Hoots), Hairy Dooters and Hairy Doots. No, but they are similar in the fact that Hairy Dooters (AKA Hairy Doots) resemble 5th assholes covered in black hair that can appear anywhere on your body and Harris Teeters along with Dairy Hooters (AKA Dairy Hoots) are like 5th hairy nipples that can do the same.
In some extreme cases, you may have everything from the Dirty Hairies and the Hairy Canaries down to the Dirty Cahooters and the Wooly Babullies, Doodie Croutons, Dut Cracks and the whole nine yards.
Dairy Nipples and Nairy Dipples are fifth hairless nipples that can grow anywhere on your body. These are a lot like Hairy Dooters & Hairy Deuters (AKA Hairy Doots which are fifth hairy assholes) and Dairy Hooters (AKA Dairy Hoots which are fifth hairy nipples), only the latter ones listed here just so happen to produce hair, not so unlike a Harris Teeter.
In some extreme cases, you may have everything from the Dirty Hairies and the Hairy Canaries down to the Dirty Cahooters and the Wooly Babullies, Doodie Croutons, Dut Cracks and the whole nine yards.
Dairy Nipples and Nairy Dipples are fifth hairless nipples that can grow anywhere on your body. These are a lot like Hairy Dooters & Hairy Deuters (AKA Hairy Doots which are fifth hairy assholes) and Dairy Hooters (AKA Dairy Hoots which are fifth hairy nipples), only the latter ones listed here just so happen to produce hair, not so unlike a Harris Teeter.
"Hex the dolls with dairy hooters! Fa la la la la, la la la la! Hex the dolls with hairy dooters! Fa la la la la, la la la la! Nairy dipples, dairy nipples! Fa la la la la la la la la! Dirty hairy hurts my dairy! Fa la la la la, la la la la!"
by ANOTHERDEADROMEO February 27, 2023
Get the Dirty Hairymug. A rule that, like Occam's Razor, requires you to favor the simplest explanations over the complex ones, but with the addition of also favoring the sexiest explanations over the mundane ones. An explanation of a thing is using Occam's Hairy Dildo if and only if simplification and sexualization are paired together into a beautiful, explanatory nutsack.
Student: Hey professor, can you please explain that notion using Occam's Hairy Dildo, because it's a little hard for me to grasp without visual aides.
Professor: Hell yea! I got you, fam.
Professor: Hell yea! I got you, fam.
by Carnivorous Pencil February 19, 2021
Get the Occam's Hairy Dildomug. Davis and Ramirez completed every sex act in the Urban Dictionary catalogue, with the exception of the Hairy Wiper.
by kmikl September 4, 2021
Get the Hairy Wipermug. A hairy mullet minge is a vagina that has incredibly long yet striaght pubes yet is shaved around the groin area,but just enough to see stubble.It can be found on any women as it is a style of pubic hair,but is mainly fashion not genetic but can be found on american hillbille women....obviously.
by Marc P November 5, 2008
Get the Hairy Mullet Mingemug.