Jesus Penis

When any male has a tattoo of Jesus inscribed upon their penis in any location.

Done so that during penetration, the man can say to the woman. "Can you feel that? You have Jesus inside you."

Woman: "Oh, Jim! That feels fantastic!"
Jim: "I knew getting a Jesus Penis was a great idea. Doesn't sex always feel better when you've got Jesus inside you?"
Woman: "DAMN RIGHT IT DOES!"

by RaptorJesus666 December 05, 2009

Jesus Desade

An Internet fiend, who trawls the web for the foulest, most disturbing and unsettling material it can provide. Should be approached with caution. Has the sexual appetite of a thousand men. A thousand debauched men.

Jesus Desade parked his bicycle in another man's orifice.
Jesus Desade will fuck you up!

by Disciple of Desade February 04, 2005

pot Jesus

The guy who takes the blame so that others may smoke.

Damn, Greg totally played pot Jesus last night when the cops busted us.

by thephil October 23, 2007

Jumpin Jesus

a word to show your expression when someone scares you

ONLY AARON AND VERONICAS..NOT BENNYS.

Jumpin Jesus you scared the bejesus out of me!

by AT02202 December 17, 2006

jesus walk

a long journey that can only be done by walking

bloke1: "sup man I had to do a jesus walk from seven sisters to ponders end"

bloke2: "raaah thats a propa jesus walk"

by slim keeno July 04, 2005

Plastic Jesus

1. A Jesus figure made out of plastic
2. An item that gives serenity to its owner

I don't care if it rains or freezes, just as long as I have my plastic Jesus! - Chris Miller

by Ryan November 13, 2003

Jesus Cold

A time when it is so cold outside that even Jesus Christ would complain about the cold.
See also: Jesus Hot, Jesus Cold, Jesus Lot, Jesus Sweet, Jesus Late, and Jesus Early

It was so Jesus Cold outside that i had to put on twenty layers of clothing and set the house on fire to keep warm.

by not_michael October 11, 2004