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celebrity marriage

1. A union between two famous people, which doesn't last long. The time it takes for light to travel the distance of the diameter of a subatomic particle is a quadrillion times longer than this union lasts.

2. When measuring the lifespan of something that fails, it's often measured in celebrity marriages.
1. Ben Afleck and J.Lo got into a celebrity marriage, but they were divorced before a camera's 1600 speed film could be exposed enough to take a picture of them in a married state.

2. Don't buy this preservative-free cow's milk, it lasts less than 10 to the hundredth power celebrity marriages.
by Wm. Wallace The Freedom Fighte February 8, 2009
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cell monkey

A person who is ostensibly unable to walk, chew gum, sit, eat, drink, sleep, work, shop, drive, breathe, take a crap, or accomplish any other task commonly performed with or without opposable digits, unless a cell phone is inexorably attached to the side of their head.

This person is typically oblivious to almost all stimuli around them including any carbon-based life forms, merging traffic, lights at intersections, toll booth gates, falling pianos, the cashier in front of them, the check-out line behind them, the person they've just walked in front of, the inappropriateness of their loud phone rants, or anything else involving sight, sound or smell (such as the fungus slowly growing on the mouth and ear piece of the greasy device).

Ironically, it has been shown that when placed in a room with other family members and friends, but without the cellular appliance, this person has alarmingly little to say to any of them. This time spent communicating face to face has been estimated to be a mere fraction of the corresponding period spent talking to the same people through the device, and at great and perpetual urgency.
Get off the phone and drive cell monkey.

It's your turn dumbass! STFU and write the check or run your debit. This store has gotta ban the freaking cell monkeys in checkout lines?

Hey cell monkey, your fly is open and you're standing in front of the forklift.
by idiot emptor April 24, 2009
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Related Words

Cemeteering

Going to multiple cemeteries in long periods of time. Usually done in one day.
"Man, I hope grandma doesn't take us on another one of those cemeteering trips.
by toadsage27 May 24, 2009
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Cele Fuel

Vodka or any alcohlolic drink put in a water-bottle to drink on the bench at hockey. Usually enhances performance and sick dangles so you can do an insane cele after. Also there is CC. Which is cele cronick. You smoke it out of an inhaler and it enhances you celebrations after a dirtyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyygoalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Its the cele fuel man no one can stop me out there.

Damn man i need some CC my celes out there are brutal.
by Doctor Dipske September 23, 2009
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Cenedese

Someone that is really laid back and chilled.
Also there for anyone at anytime or place no matter what
You are so "Cenedese"
Man i love you, your so totally Cenedese
Your the most Cendesical person ive ever met.
by TERMINATOR 5,000 December 21, 2009
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Celebreleech

A individual usually totally bereft of actual talent or
fortune who habitually attempts to glom on to an

actual celebrity, hoping the fame or fortune will
rub off sufficiently to make them a "celebrity" also.
Some actually succeed, like reaching some sort of

critical mass, in becoming famous for being famous.
Having failed to extort pro footballer Shawn Merriman,
annoying celebreleech Tila Tequila has resurfaced

claiming to be the "fiancee" of heiress Casey Johnson.
(Not that she wants to stake a claim to any of the

Johnson fortune or anything...)
by Guitarist1234 January 8, 2010
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celebreligious

A celebriligious person fixates on the the lives of celebrities (or more commonly, celebutantes) and takes great interest in the most mundane aspects of their lives with an obsessed, religious-like fervor.

Celebriligious zealots are often spotted reading "Us Weekly" or "People Magazine" or watching E!.
Ex. 1:

Celebriligious person: "OMFG did you hear?!?! Spencer Pratt just <did something douchey and retarded and not remotely interesting>!!! How amazingly interesting!!"

Regular person: "I hate you."

Ex. 2:

Regular person: "What are you doing?"

Celebriligious person: "Just reading in the latest People Magazine about how Brangelina's going to adopt another dozen African babies -- how sweet! And just look at what Paris Hilton was wearing last Saturday!! I just love her!!"

Regular person: "I hate myself for talking to you."

Ex. 3:

Celebreligious person: "Oh no! I forgot to TiVo the new episode of "The Hills"!! I just might kill myself!!"

Regular person: "May I help?"
by Mister_BS January 26, 2010
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