Turd Yacht

A person whose turdness is the size of a yacht!

Jimmy: Hey I just ate the last of the cake!
Lauren: It was my cake! I wanted it!
Jimmy: Ohh well.
Lauren: Your a turd yacht!

by xthexfilipinox January 4, 2011

Turd Blinkers

The single minded focus of someone who really, really has to take a crap.

Guy #1: What the hell, Matt just completely ignored me as he walked past!

Guy #2: Ahh dont take offence man, we had German food for lunch, he's probably just got turd blinkers on

by ArrV April 1, 2011

murder turd

When someone is experiencing opioid- induced constipation to the extent death is likely.

I heard Elvis died from murder turd.

by Murder turd May 16, 2016

vapor turd

A fart that's so concentrated with vaporized poo particles, that the person sitting next to you claims that you have shit yourself, or can taste your turd.

Can also produce short term swamp ass and/or skid marks (room rooms).

Josh ate 10 pounds of beans, cheese, beer and yogurt right before going to bed. Poor Ashley was up all night suffering the wrath of the vapor turds.

by ashmashedpotatoes November 30, 2013

Gay turd

When someone takes to much cum in their ass and you poop out sperm

Last night was wild with Mark, I had a crazy gay turd this morning!

by L.A. 31 June 14, 2021

turd burnishing

Trying to polish or perfect something that doesn't benefit from, or is worthy of, such effort.

I spent four hours editing my latest Urban Dictionary entry - I'm such a turd burnisher.

Our boss spent the whole retreat going back and forth on our "Mission Statement" - we burnished that turd but good.

Give David the newsletter / social media project - he loves turd burnishing, and is damn good at it.

by Bono Lex January 31, 2014

turd-scissors

A pair of scissors kept in the bathroom and exclusively used to divide large feces into flush-able segments.

I was at my boyfriends' house last night and took a giant crap. Fortunately, I found a pair of turd-scissors under the sink, and quickly cut the problem down to size.

by Trottz January 22, 2014