When taking a dump in a bathroom that is not located in your house, you wad up toilet paper and rest it on the seat or porcelain where your penis would rest, to ensure your penis does not make contact with the bowl.
When john went to crap in the port a john he built a penis pad so he didn't have to rest his penis on the plastic.
by bigdogshlo69 January 09, 2012
The phenomenon where, in colder winter months, vasoconstriction leads to an average of 30% less girth in the male genitalia. This is due to the body trying to conserve heat, thereby shutting down certain blood pathways to stay warm; the penis being one of them...
Guy 1: Polar vortex hit this week, and I swear my dick shrunk like a half inch in diameter. I don't even want to show my girlfriend...
Guy 2: Sounds like a case of Winter Penis
Guy 2: Sounds like a case of Winter Penis
by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin February 04, 2019
penis waggle
guy 1: my penis is waggin real bad right now i cant feel it
guy 2: what made it start
guy 1: i won 5 quid on the lottery
guy 1: my penis is waggin real bad right now i cant feel it
guy 2: what made it start
guy 1: i won 5 quid on the lottery
by A PErson called IG November 24, 2012
A mythical creature in the stories told around 2000 years ago about a legendary monkey that has god-like/omnipotent powers that will walk up to you in your dreams and steal your penis if you're a bad kid. Although it's just a tale that teaches kids to be good, this phenomena has shown up in many photos from the early 1860s to 1970s, only to disappear completely from every photo 69 hours later, after the picture was taken. Although having unlimited power would make you have every power imaginable and every power unimaginable, he only recorded powers are as follows:
-Teleportation
-The ability to make the skin of your penis roll up on itself and shred apart.
-Monky
-
-Ability to show himself in dreams.
-Ability to erase evidence of his existence.
-Immortality/Invincibility
-Teleportation
-The ability to make the skin of your penis roll up on itself and shred apart.
-Monky
-
-Ability to show himself in dreams.
-Ability to erase evidence of his existence.
-Immortality/Invincibility
Derek: Dude, what happened, why were you in the hospital?
James: T-the p-p-penis m-monkey got me.
Derek: Who? What are you talking about?
James: MY PENIS I-IT'S GONE!!
Derek: D: oh no
Tyrone: What happened?
Derek: Penis Monkey.
James: T-the p-p-penis m-monkey got me.
Derek: Who? What are you talking about?
James: MY PENIS I-IT'S GONE!!
Derek: D: oh no
Tyrone: What happened?
Derek: Penis Monkey.
by poopoo monkey machine man May 26, 2020
The fat area around a man's penis. It can be so fat that his penis appears smaller than it really is due to the fat sucking it inwards. The equivalent to a "fupa" on a female.
I tried to get my freak on with Mike last night, but his penis boppy was so fat he had a hard time screwing me.
by MaryMary90 February 04, 2014
A girl who is sleeps around a lot; easy; loose; whore; skank; slut etc. (insult)
a place where multiple guys frequently park their dick
condom
a place where multiple guys frequently park their dick
condom
OMG, that girl slept with 5 different guys this weekend, multiple times, and her boyfriend still hasn't found out! She is such a penis holster!
God I'm horny, I gotta find me a penis holster for tonight.
I forgot my penis holster, and now she might be pregnant!
God I'm horny, I gotta find me a penis holster for tonight.
I forgot my penis holster, and now she might be pregnant!
by Maggie Rose January 31, 2008
Any player in Destiny who spams their super or heavy weapon to kill players in Crucible. Players usually think they are hot shit when doing this and are penis feeding the players they kill.
by TheDrifter101 December 21, 2019