fuck me hard up the arse with a stick

A statement that is said in the event of utter disbelief, or in shock, awe, etc.

Dave: "Alex, did you know that we're all going to die in three seconds?"
Alex: "Fuck me hard up the arse with a stick!"

by AlexBumpkin November 13, 2007

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as long as i have a hole in my arse

A phrase tacked on the end of a statement regarding the unlikeliness of something to happen. Can be swapped out with phrases such as "when pigs fly" or "when hell freezes over."

Popularized by BBC series "Life on Mars."

There will never be a female prime minister as long as I have a hole in my arse.

by Rpg July 24, 2006

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bias (bone idle arse syndrome)

a condition whereby the victim ingests more food than their rectum is willing to excrete

person 1.gee she's a fat bitch

person 2.yeah if it was'nt for her bias (bone idle arse syndrome) she would look like posh spice

by rnr360 January 29, 2010

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stick a broom up his arse

Slang, mainly UK, meaning that the person needs to be helped to get going on a task or get a better attitude in order to get motivated.

"If Jeff doesn't get on with it, you'll have to stick a broom up his arse to get him going!"

by Julie57 May 07, 2017

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Scratching your arse and smelling your fingers

British • Verb Phrase
Intentionally doing something you know will cause you pain or emotional discomfort, just in order to feel something.

Person 1: This tastes absolutely disgusting.
Person 2: Why are you still eating it?

Person 1: ... I'm not really sure.
Person 2: You're just scratching your arse and smelling your fingers then, aren't you?

by Leery Loon November 26, 2021

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