carpet

letting your significant other (usually a female) walk all over you and take advantage in a relationship.

Leo’s such a little carpet, he let his girl stick a finger in his bum after he said no (leo.d0b)

by pistol mike January 22, 2023

Magic Carpet Ride

Placing two to three sheets of toilet paper lengthwise along the long axis of the inspection shelf portion of a toilet. The purpose is to reduce the friction of stool as the toilet is flushed and virtually eliminate skid marks as the log goes down the flume.

That was the largest beef I have ever laid out. I am so glad I did a good pre-flight on that inspection shelf. That turd went for a magic carpet ride !

Please lay down a magic carpet when using the water closet, my back hurts and I am tired of scrubbing burn-outs off my porcelain. Danke !

by Karl Hungus February 5, 2023

carpet grin

When a cat opens it's mouth drawing air in and up into the Jacobson's organ to process the scent more deeply than your cat's nose can. Usually resulting in an open mouth grinning expression.

"What's on this blanket? The cats got a wicked carpet grin."
"Dale, the damn cat is grinning at the carpet again!"

by LordOftheTacos February 20, 2023

Carpet fucked

The art of making a goliath dildo out of carpets and lubing it up with 32 packets of mayo for your own sexual needs

Yo man, i just got carpet fucked last night by my 32 year old carper

by commanderveinycok December 3, 2025

Oli's Carpet

A post nuclear site usually used to refer to somthing destroyed or ruined, or used to refer to somthing disgusting.

That looks like oli's Carpet
This tastes like oli's Carpet

by Fusion248 December 7, 2025

Carpet fairy

someone who smokes crack and is 1 always on the carpet looking for their crack toke they lost 2 they are always on the carpet looking for a crack toke they didn't just drop but still are looking anyways even though there's no dope on the floor 3 they are pretending to be looking for their toke they claimed to have just lost but never did they are really just looking all over the carpet for other dope that may be on the carpet at whosever place they are at 4 they are looking for other peoples dope on the floor 5 they have stolen dope off whomever they are hanging out with from there place and they plant it or throw it on the floor then pretend to be either looking for their own toke or helping the other person find dope for them and then claiming it was there's they just dropped it 6 they some how always seem to find dope on your floor claiming to have either lost it the other day or just dropped it or like they find someone else's toke that came over and left and they found a chunk of crack they left behind even though you swept your floor they mysteriously a little too much always find or claim to have found magicaly Make a peice of crack appear out of no where

Person 1 : that's all I have left damn they really do need to start calling this shit more Im already down to just a gram I could have sworn I had like fucking at least 2 grams

Person 2: same here bro all my dope is gone I think I see a chunk under the corner of the rug right there that's probably mine from earlier

Person 1: get the fuck off my floor you fucking carpet fairy your always on all fours crawling around my floor for crying out loud your not digging though my garbage either

by XyloZeem January 5, 2026

Go Squirt Someone Else's Carpet!

What you tell a complaining Karen acting like a chihuahua peeing angrily in front of you.

"You got what you paid for, go squirt someone else's carpet!" as said by the comedian Fromunda.

by Left Wing Fascist January 7, 2026