Morning Wood

When a guy wakes up to a hard dick after a long night of sex

Lydia : Good morning Chad last night was amazing thanks for letting me sleep in your bed! (wink)
Chad : No problem sis my wife don't mind sleeping on the couch!
Lydia : Mmm! Looks like you got some Morning Wood!
Chad : Yeah I guess I do we should not waste it!
Lydia : Does Chad want a blowjob?
Chad : Uh Yeah DUH!
Lydia : Mmmm! Mmmm! Mmmm! Mmmm!
Chad : Damn Lydia you sure know how to suck! Ahhhh! Ahhhh!
Chad's Mom : Hey Chad time for breakfast OH MY GOD NOT AGAIN!
Chad : Get lost bitch Lydia is taking care of my Morning Wood!
Chad : Mmm! Now time for some sasuage in your ass!
Lydia : Mmm! Breakfast in bed!
Chad : Ahhhhh! Ahhhhh! Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhh!
Lydia : Oink! Oink! Oink! Oink! Snort! Snort! Snort!
Chad's Mom : OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! (sniff) (sniff)
Chad's Dad : Honey do I hear pig's OH MY GOD NOT AGAIN! (sniff) (sniff)
Steve : Hey guy's check it out ive got Morning Wood! (wink)
Chad's Mom : O Wow it's so BIG!

Chad's Dad : Damn't Honey quit staring at that guy's Wood!

by SlopNChop December 3, 2018

mooning

thinking of someone you are in love with

"are you still mooning over your man?"

by p12etty July 20, 2008

Morning Jew

The most beautiful sight in the world

I awoke in a tropical paradise and smiled as the first rays of sun beamed through the window and glistened on my Morning Jew...

by W_L March 18, 2010

elliot in the morning

D.J. that broadcasts for the D.C. and Richmond area. He is rumored to have a huge penis.

"That Elliot from Elliot in the morning could satisfy a moose!"

by Craig "big meat" Henderson July 20, 2007

Morning Glory

The act of waking someone up by ejaculating on their face.

"Dude, my roommate slept in and didn't give me a ride to work, so I have him a Morning Glory. For some reason, he's really pissed at me right now."

by 1-uptheguy April 9, 2009

Morning Rose

Like Morning Wood...but with lipstick stains that make up the "petals" of a rose.

She was a freak last night, had me waking up to a morning rose.

by Obsydaen December 2, 2016

Morning Cup of Hoe

Sex with a slut/prostitute before your daily schedule.

Random Dude #1: What did you do this morning?
Random Dude #2: Nothing. Just had my morning cup of hoe.
Random Dude #1: Nice... who'd u do it with?
Random Dude #2: Oh... just a whore.

by MiNdLeSsSeLfInDuLgEnCe January 17, 2009