midwest

kansas city, st louis, chicago, detroit, indianapolis, minneapolis, milwaukee, omaha, wichita

i'm from the midwest

by damon February 3, 2005

The Joys of Midwife Beating

Before you join our little club, you cannot beat midwives with impunity.

If we allow you to join and induct you, you will be granted your Totin Chip, whereby you may beat midwives with impunity. Reducing their faces to rubble and hamburger.

It's a guy thing.

The Joys of Midwife Beating make the world a sunny place!

by Jacques Asse December 28, 2009

Midwest Layaway

When you take a dump on the floor in front of the layaway counter at Kmart.

Only two more Midwest Layaway deposits, and that VHS Box set of Full House Season 3 is totally mine.

by dinkle donkle September 18, 2011

Midwest Snowsuit

The winter wardrobe of males ages 12-19 in the midwest. Generally consists of baggy shorts and t-shirts/wifebeaters. Most who dress this way think it makes them look tough for braving the sub-20-degree temperatures in summer clothes, although they usually just end up looking like douchebags.

John had to borrow Matt's coat because he wore a Midwest Snowsuit to the Christmas light display.

by RowdyRazz April 14, 2012

midwest apology

A midwest tradition where, some time after drama, everyone is assumed to be forgiven, and life resumes as usual.

A: She just kinda started acting normal around me again
B: Sounds like a midwest apology

by GGlitchr October 4, 2018

Midway

Midway is a neighborhood on the southwest side of Chicago. It is mostly composed of whites and mexicans and the two parts that make up the area are Garfield Ridge and Clearing. Most nights, all midway kids do are drink on the tracks or at Valley if someone’s not throwing at their house. Midway kids party the hardest and here you will meet the coolest people on the planet. Mt.Greenwood, Beverly, and Orland kids think it’s the ghetto, but it’s really not.

Midway Kids: “Wtm tonight?”
“We’re heading to Valley or Stripes if (blanks) house doesn’t work out.”

by anonymous15 December 14, 2018

Midwestern Hilter Apple Cider 360 Surprise

The act of time traveling to the year Hitler was born wearing a tuxedo that is too small. You then must kidnap baby Hitler and raise him as your own son. After years of caring for the child, you develop an attachment to him. You love your son, Hitler. On Hitler's 9th Birthday you get him an indigo blender. You convince Hitler to make apple cider using only green apples. While Hitler is blending the green apples you take his head and shove it into the blender, killing him slowly. Take the blender and time travel back to present time and fly to Minnesota. Walk into McDonald's with a tv you bought from across the street, and drink the apple cider while watching Family Feud.

Midwestern Hilter Apple Cider 360 Surprise

by RonRonson69 January 18, 2020