condom

The only rightful thing that can come between two lovers.

Last week, I went to the store and it was written below the package, "If you're not completely satisfied with the product, Happy father's day" - stretch.me.not condoms.

by rocksterraghu July 13, 2006

Kobe Bryant condoms

the protection you want, for the sex she doesn't.

Kobe Bryant condoms commercial script:

Kobe "Hey, do me."

Lady "I'd rather not."

Kobe "I wasn't asking."

by 1234567890zz December 13, 2009

ear condom

protection from speech that would otherwise offend you

Person 1: Didn't the teacher's stereotypical remarks offend you today?
Person 2: No, I always wear an ear condom in that class.

by dersponge55 May 15, 2011

e-condom

A term used for all your internet security. Firewalls, Anti Virus, Anti Spam etc. All computers should have an E-condom.

Hey man, this Nortan Internet Security 2005 gives my computer a tough E-condom!

Don't let your computer get ITD's, wrap it up with an E-condom!

by Mohammed March 31, 2005

couch condom

Anything such as a sheet, blanket, sleeping bag, trash bag, etc., which might prevent one from contact with a soiled couch, especially on upholstery soiled with sweat, sex juices or butt smudges. Much in the same way a pillow case or a t-shirt can protect one from a filthy pillow.

"Both Cyka's aunt and Booby have had real nasty sex right there. You'll probably want to throw down a couch condom before you rest your dizzy head there."

by Etch September 8, 2006

condom break

When your condom breaks during sex...duh!

Person 1: Did you hear? During sex, John and Michelle's condom broke. (condom break)
Person 2: Damn, they're fked now.

by SoFetchh May 26, 2008

Condom Nut-Hug

The act of ignorantly putting on a condom so that it covers both the shaft and the testicles.

Person 1: I'm so big, even Magnum XLs feel tight. They're roomy around the shaft, but they just don't fit around my balls.
Person 2: What the fuck is wrong with you?
Person 1: What?
Person 2: You're giving yourself a fucking condom nut-hug, you jackass.

by The Bod January 18, 2009