Tortoiseitis

Slower than fuck. A very slow person.

It takes that bitch forever to put her makeup on she has tortoiseitis.

by Mike Hawksbigger January 31, 2023

Touching The Tortoise

Masturbation of the male genitals

Touching the tortoise- masturbation

My girlfriend sent nudes, I’m going to touch my tortoise to them

by WillyMaster1001 November 04, 2023

wheezing tortoise

someone who shot an ostrich in the last 34 minutes

he is a wheezing tortoise

by Human who is also an ostrich June 24, 2022

Naughtis Tortoise

When someone says something you don't agree with or find a bit weird or controversial (e.g acting sus)
You would Use this set of words in the beginning of a sentence or just say them on their own after the phrase you dont agree with occurs.

Person1: Wait there a second i'm coming now
Person2: I'm 'coming' in your mom hahaha
Person3: Naughtis Tortoise, why you got to be acting sus like that

by OatmealUser January 03, 2022

tortoise tickler

When being anally fingered so deep that the finger reaches fecal matter.

We were in a gay tussle when he used the tortoise tickler, and then he had to stop to wash his hands.

by Myspeakingpseudonym June 25, 2015

tortoising

The moment when you can't hold in youre poo and the tip of the shit comes out of your anus. Most of the time you are able to pull it back in when you have strong sphincter.

Oh damn, i am tortoising . I really need to find a lavatory or my briefs will get very dirty

by Tortoising July 27, 2019

Tortoising

When you have to poop really bad and can't hold it,that is when you tortoise. You let the poo come out of your anus just a little bit so i looks like a tortoise coming out of it's Shell.

Sir can i go to the toilet? I am already tortoising.

by Tortoising October 09, 2017