Masturbation

Sex with someone I love.
- Woody Allen
Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen in Annie Hall, 1977
by mandingoe November 07, 2005
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masturbating

when a person 'makes love' to themselves by gently stroking their genital area. done for pleasure. women- often involves stimulating the clitoris, and sometimes involves inserting a long hard object into the vagina. men- involves wanking, i.e. gripping the hand around the penis and vigorously moving it up and down. masturbation can end in the woman/man cumming. often can cause embarrassment and often taboo, especially as regards to women.
omg my mum totally walked in on me havin a wank, dude!
no way, dude!
way!
no way!
way! and she was like, samuel, we are going to have a serious talk about masturbating!!
by nipcharmedtuck June 07, 2006
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masturbate

One of the sexiest things that a man can possibly do.
Hot damn...there isn't much else I can say.
by raspberry (lust) muffin July 11, 2005
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Masturbation

a way to stay faithfulto your girl.

you do it cause: youre horny/bored/to kill time/just because its a habit.
masturbation is a great way to relieve horniness or just cause youre bored.
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masturbation

1. America's number one past-time.
2. Reasons why many kittens die.
1.
Dude 1: "Dude you wanna go party or something?"
Dude 2: "Nah... I'm gonna participate in the great American past-time."
Dude 1: "Ahh... masturbation."

2.
Dude 1: "Dude that kitten just died."
Dude 2: "Ahh shit, I shouldn't have masturbated last night."
by thewhorewhoisjerome August 02, 2007
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masturbate

1) SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement. (v.) The act of sexually pleasing yourself to orgasm. For males this involves using the hands to massage the penis in a thrusting motion, while for females this involves rubbing and stimulation of the vaginal and clittoral areas. This is often accompanied by some sort of sexually pleasing visual and/or mental stimulation.

2) (n.) Something a true Catholic cannot do because the wrath of the imaginary friend will come down upon them. See wordgod/word.

I was so horny I bought a Playboy and masturbated.
by fraghappy November 07, 2003
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masturbate

What to do whenever you aren't in school or at work. Actually, you can do it there too, but be subtle.

I masturbated while I wrote this definition for urban dictionary.
by IM JERKING OFF RITE NOW April 04, 2009
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