"Your slumber-partner will snooze silently during periods that you're up and away from the boudoir, but then he will totally 'saw logs' whenever you're actually cohabitating with him --- and wanting to get some shut-eye --- in the same bed."
Perhaps many instances of Murphy's Law of Snoring stem from the snorer's needing more space to "spread out", which he would have whenever he has the whole bed to himself; being more cramped can restrict air-passages and so on..
by QuacksO September 29, 2019
Get the Murphy's Law of Snoringmug. "The 'speed' of the Internet --- i.e., how long web-pages take to 'load' and/or respond to you mouse-clicks --- will be in direct inverse proportion to how urgently you need to view the desired material; the connection will be even slower at times there's someone else waiting for you who's also in a hurry.
My buddy needed me to hastily Google engine-bolt-torquing specs during an emergency-repair task he was struggling to get done before a downpour, but the Web was "slower dan molasses runnin' uphill in da wintertime" --- it was a classic "Murphy's Law of Internet-Speed" scenario!
by QuacksO July 28, 2018
Get the Murphy's Law of Internet-Speedmug. "A device that you're repairing will operate **absolutely perfectly** while you have it taken apart to work on it, but then when you get it all put back together and have all the cabinet-screws re-inserted, THAT'S when the device will decide not to work again."
To lessen the chance of getting "bitten" by Murphy's Law of Post-repair Reassembly, one should double-check everything on a refurbished device before putting it back together again.
by QuacksO March 7, 2019
Get the Murphy's Law of Post-repair Reassemblymug. You can wait 'n' wait till clear into mid-May to trim off your itchy bushy Santa-Claus winter beard and you'll have nuthin' but sweltering-skinned moderate-temperature days all along, but if you "break out da Norelco" at any point during dat period, da weather will immediately turn frigid and blustery again, and then you'll have chilly-cheeks syndrome for an entire month!
One good way to minimize da "Murphy's Law of shaving" debacle is to simply wait till da end of March to "mow da lawn" --- dat way, you'll not be so likely to needlessly suffer from extra-warm weather-temps' making your chin and jowls feel like they're inside a blast-furnace, but on da other hand, it will minimize da chances of "freezin' yer face off", too, since there are seldom any significant cold snaps later than three months into da new year.
by QuacksO March 15, 2025
Get the Murphy's Law of shavingmug. When a woman give a fellatio to a man after consuming potential barf material and end up puking on the man’s shaft
by Canadiah December 12, 2019
Get the Murphy’s lawmug. That every thing Murphy says is true and should be followed. Except for the things that aren't funny, which are.... alot.
by Murphy September 10, 2003
Get the murphy's lawmug. "If you 'prepare for the worst' by bringing along extra jackets/gloves, an umbrella, etc., then the skies will be sunny and mild all the time you're 'out 'n' about'. But if you decide to leave all that stuff behind at home and set out on your trip in just your ordinary street-clothes, there'll be a bleepin' MONSOON or HURRICANE!
The morning started out kinda overcast and nippy, so I brought an umbrella, thick hoodie-jacket, and gloves with me when I set out to run some errands around town. Well, naturally, once I got a fair distance from home and thus I didn't wanna traipse all the way back to put everything away again, the sun came out and the day got really warm, and so I was just feverishly lugging all that extra stuff around with me for nothing... classic case of "Murphy's Law of Foul-Weather Gear", I guess.
by QuacksO May 18, 2019
Get the Murphy's Law of Foul-Weather Gearmug.