crap table

Refers to any debris-cluttered horizontal-topped item of furniture normally used for dining, writing/drawing, repairing/constructing, etc.

You can often tell the difference between a bachelor-pad and a couple/family-apartment simply by glancing around to observe how stuff is arranged --- if there's a lady in the house, everything will generally be neat and orderly, whereas a guy who lives alone will likely have at least one crap table where the flotsam and jetsam of typical everyday single-dude existence tends to gravitate to and then never see the light of day for months... he simply tosses his randomly-acquired tidbits there because at the time the items seem too precious/possibly-useful to discard, but then when he eventually has to rummage through his "treasures" to find some solitary item he put there six months ago, he face-palmingly wonders why he ever held onto most of the crap in the first place (extra points if he thought to drag over a wastebasket before beginning his "attack" on the pile).

by QuacksO February 5, 2018

toxic table

A group of girls that you should NOT mess with EVER

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD it’s the toxic table

by milson jim’s dog July 2, 2020

Penguin Table

Penguin Table described when there is an awkward silence at a table.

"During the Thanksgiving feast with my family, it was a penguin table"

by Cubed3D February 13, 2025

.....I Believe, I Was Jumping Over A Coffee Table, I Believe.....

.....I Believe, I Was Jumping Over A Coffee Table, I Believe.....

.....I Believe, I Was Jumping Over A Coffee Table, I Believe.....

by Angel234IsTheDarkSeraphim March 29, 2025

Cristmass Table

WHen your work, arrange a party around the Cristmass holiday. All of the employe dress up and drink untill their so wasted, that they do all sort of stupid things and try to hit on everything with a pulse.

I got a Cristmass Table tonigh, it will be awsome... maby i nail some of the girls from work.

by Monsterball November 22, 2005

Lexington Table Tennis Massacre

In a stunning upset at the 2025 Lexington Table Tennis Amateur Finals, underdog Devin shocked the crowd and toppled reigning champion Blake, handing the favorite his first and only loss of the season to finish with a 27–1 record. Known more for his erratic play than consistency, Devin brought relentless intensity and razor-sharp focus to dismantle Blake’s trademark defensive strategy, winning 27 games in a dramaticbbeat-down fashion. Each blistering rally and improbable return chipped away at Blake’s composure, turning what was expected to be a routine coronation into a gritty, unforgettable battle. The tournament ended not with the underdog’s defeat, but with the downfall of a near-perfect titan—and the rise of a new champion forged in chaos.

Did you hear about the Lexington Table Tennis Massacre of 2025?

I did! But I also heard Blake paid stupid money to get the footage and results scrubbed from the internet.

by dadboddev June 2, 2025

Table Licker

Phrase referring to a person who is so unable to refuse a dare, they will do anything, even lick a dirty table at a bar.

You should dare Beth to do it since you know she’s a table licker.

by HERX44 November 27, 2020