Reverse Midas Touch

See 'Jackass Of All Trades.'

Somebody who is absolutely useless at any task.

Turns everything to crap.

Ask him to perform a task and he will make a substandard effort.

Tradie: "Hey boss, why did you fire T?"
Boss: "Because he was fucken useless, the Jackass of All Trades had a Reverse Midas Touch."
Tradie: "Whoa, fuck me dead and call me Mary, I guess the company was going into the shitter..."

by Schteeeeve March 6, 2022

Touch n bust

Is when crack cocaine is so soft and wet when you touch it ,it falls apart

Man I don’t want that damn touch n bust, I want that real hard!! ( in crack head voice)

by Jaydeegtmny July 27, 2021

Touch My Bumpkin

A saying used when wanting hands placed in and around your sweet booty.
Usually spoken in a high pitched porn voice

It is Ben's birthday today and as usual he is feeling rather amorous.
He sits alone in his house thinking about getting his thicc as fuck booty snacked on.
He begins to scream out at a frequency akin to a bats screech, "Touch my bumpkin! Touch my little bumpkin! Touch my sweaty little bumpkin!"
His repeated cries for an anal thrashing fall on deaf ears. Ben then shoves a quick fing in his bum and heads to bed. Goodnight Ben

by GozUnlimited April 1, 2020

Pre-Marital Touching

The most unholy thing on man or women could possibly commit.

Bob: "No it cant be Karen is Pre-marital touching that poor man"

by pseudonym is a dickhead June 24, 2020

Titty Touch November

The Month Of November Is The Month Of Titty Touching And Nipple Grabbing.In November Everybody Gets Free Passes To Grab Tittys And Nipples.

Imma grab Kaylas Titty I can get in trouble because its Titty Touch November

by ThemonthMan October 3, 2019

Butt-Touch Magnet

A person who attracts more than two accidental butt-touches per month.

Sha-nay-nay: Some stranger just touched my butt again!

Teniqua: Oh my gawd girl! You're a butt-touch magnet!!

by The Trampettes April 17, 2013

Touch Pad Finger

The medical condition where the tip of your index finger gets sore as the result of hours of use on a laptop computer touchpad. Often caused by surfing porn, Facebook, and Craigslist.

Anyone have a mouse? I'm getting Touch Pad Finger

by tpf November 29, 2010