John Pork was born into poverty, never knowing his mother. His father, a pig, died when John was only three, leaving him an orphan. As the offspring of a human and a pig, John was best described as a man-pig—akin to South Park's "man-bear-pig." After his father's death, John was sent to the Adoptuah "Adopt on that thang" Adoption Center, where he was adopted by G-Man, a key figure in the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion. G-Man was a celebrated pilot in the Toilet Force Air and flew the notorious "We Bring the Boom."
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
John's adopted mother, Hailey Welch, was an international star and the host of the popular podcast Talk Tuah. At 20, John was invited onto her show, sparking his rise to fame. His appearance led to a national phenomenon: John Pork calling people. After the podcast, John began dialing strangers' phones, causing panic and outrage. The unsolicited calls sparked protests, and the song "John Pork Is Calling", by artist dontcarewontcare, became a global hit.
However, John Pork's fame was fleeting. When the Skibidi Toilet Rebellion reignited, John was drafted. Eager to follow his father's legacy, he joined the Toilet Force Air, piloting the same plane his father had. His bravery earned him the codename "Hawk 2" and the Flickermunting Award for Upstanding Gooning.
Afterward, John met Joana Pork, his future wife, and settled in Georgia. He worked for a government contractor, built the Pork Family Compound, and fathered three children: Jimmy Ham, John Pork Jr., and Billy Bacon.
"Hey Adrian, you're getting a call!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
"Oh, it's from my good friend, John Pork!"
"Dude. Have you heard dontcarewontcares new single 'John Pork is calling...?' EVERYONE is listening to it!"
"Yeah, man! I saw Skibidi Chris listening to it earlier!"
"Haley Griner, what do you think of John Pork?"
"He's SO HOT!!"
by Pork's Historical Society November 25, 2024
Get the John Porkmug. by inkedsexylexi May 30, 2024
Get the lesbian porkmug. by Chimp-Arm April 25, 2024
Get the Horse Porkmug. 
1. An unforeseeable, unpredictable event that occurs when attempting to complete a task or do something cool, BUT produces a result that was even cooler and more rare than you ever thought would happen.
2. Being so incredibly fortunate to feast your eyes on something so unique and rare that you hold that memory dear until you explain it to another believer of ‘the pork nugget’ and share a cheeky smile and eye squint with them.
2. Being so incredibly fortunate to feast your eyes on something so unique and rare that you hold that memory dear until you explain it to another believer of ‘the pork nugget’ and share a cheeky smile and eye squint with them.
1. Attempting to throw a ball off a wall into a cup, but it hits the edge of a brick, rebounds off your cousins chin, knocks a budgie off its perch and THEN lands in the original cup. ‘What a Pork Nugget!’
2. When you see the woman of your dreams and think to yourself… ‘ohhh what a pork nugget’
2. When you see the woman of your dreams and think to yourself… ‘ohhh what a pork nugget’
by PorkyBusiness March 8, 2022
Get the Pork Nuggetmug. To have sexual relations with a type of fruit by either hollowing a hole and repetitively thrusting it, or cutting the fruit into slices and forming a frussy by taping the slices into a round shape for sexual pleasure.
Friend: “Hey Zach, got any plans tonight?”
Zach: “Oh man, I’m busy preparing to smash this freshly cut apple with the ole fashioned Hawaiian Pork Poke!”
Friend: “Ah man, I'm missing out aren’t I??”
Zach: “Oh man, I’m busy preparing to smash this freshly cut apple with the ole fashioned Hawaiian Pork Poke!”
Friend: “Ah man, I'm missing out aren’t I??”
by Gordeauxdatboee October 22, 2017
Get the Hawaiian pork pokemug. by elynnaie July 27, 2025
Get the pork sandwichmug.