turd sandwich

A situation in which the alternative is only slightly worse than eating a turd sandwich.

Man, I would rather eat a turd sandwich than vote for GW b for president.

by Kenny bo August 27, 2006

shiniest turd

The best looking thing amongst a group of terrible things. Even though it may look good when compared to those other things, it's really nothing to be excited about. It's the best of worst.

Person 1: Hey Microsoft released Windows 7! It's their best OS yet!
Person 2: Yeah whatever, it's just the shiniest turd in the box.

Person 1: Did you check out those hillbilly women over there? they're all ugly but one actually has all her teeth!
Person 2: That would make her the shiniest turd in the box!

by mjsaworld August 19, 2010

Turd Toter

Someone that deliberately puts off taking a dump until their stomach hurts so bad and they start dotting their drawers!

That turd toter has to take a dump, but is putting it off as long as he/she can to see if they can set a record for the worlds longest turd.

by Quaigmire September 11, 2009

Turd Souffle

A well risen turd based desert made as follows:
1. Shit yourself
2. Incubate in your trouser oven
3. Pass anal gas through the steaming pants pudding
4. Serve

It was bad enough that I shat myself, but the preceding bottom burp gave birth to a rancid turd souffle

by Party Weasel October 13, 2010

Sock Turd

A sock turd is a little annoying ball of lint that ends up in your sock after you wash them. They eventually end up stuck between your toes.

I put my sock on and had a big lump of sock turd under my heel.

by Uncle_Mel February 19, 2010

turd animals

A childhood game, carried all the way into adulthood, typically played by ‘only children’ who learn very early on to amuse themselves with everyday occurrences such as taking a poop and then turning it into a game by staring into the toilet to determine what animal their fabulous turd most closely resembles.

Since I’m now fairly well-known for so many incredible things, I’ve posted just a few of my more recent turd animals for my followers who may be interested in joining me to admire this small sample of my most unique and potentially collectible floating brown sculptures.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 18, 2023

Dog turd

A type of alternative medicine.

Jim: Hey Joe, how's your headache?
Joe: I went to the doctor as you said and I still have it but now I'm a $200 poorer.
Jim: You idiot, I said Dog Turd and not doctor.

by selfimportantsht December 12, 2020