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Lithuanian Blumpkin

A blumpkin where you've only eaten rye bread for the last week, making your excrement large and quick
Person 1: Dude, I heard you got a Lithuanian Blumpkin

Person 2: Yeah dude, my shit was volatile
by LogJamShep March 8, 2022
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blumpkin wrap

the act of oral sex while one is shitting and covering lap and head with a blanket / getting a blowjob while covering up blower with a blanket
dont know how sally can stand the smell while giving joe a blumpkin wrap
by cfreefuckface March 25, 2022
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Country Blumpkin

Unlike a typical blumpkin that can be performed in a residential toilet or public lavatory a country blumpkin takes place solely in an outhouse.

Generally a sloppier variety of blumpkin, a country blumpkin is a no holds barred experience that often results with an explosive aftermath.
It is not uncommon for the recipient (blumpkine) to experience a gummier blumpkin from a less tooth baring country blumpkiner.
I was out of town last week and you wouldn't believe the Country Blumpkin this farm chick gave me!
by Alfred Paca April 4, 2022
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Brute Force Blumpkins

a group of mythical creatures that only few men get to experience that ride fast on motorcycles
Those Brute Force Blumpkins we’re flying on their bikes.
by Bent-it April 18, 2022
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Blumpkin Messiah

Much like receiving a regular blumpkin, a blumpkin messiah is the process/result in which a man or woman is receiving oral sex while taking a shit and reading scripture form the Holy Bible loudly. Some insist that the "giver" should be of holy descent, but this is not required and only a caveat of excellence. After one has accomplished this act, they have become a Blumpkin Messiah.
After seeing Billy and Mother Vanessa leaving the bathroom at the same time as she wiped blumpkin spray from her face, the choir new Billy had become the new blumpkin messiah.
by kobetherapist55 November 18, 2020
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Royal Blumpkin

A lavish example of a standard blumpkin, yet executed as if the receiver was a king demanding food.
Royal Blumpkin : Service me whilst I eat this sandwich, and properly defecate into this bowl.
by SpiLLsHirE November 18, 2020
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surprise blumpkin

your having a relaxing shit and the door bursts open and the person yells Surprise blumpkin and starts to give you unplanned oral sex
Cameron burst into the hot portaloo. Yells surprise blumpkin and started sucking. He enjoys when the poo poo snapped off and splashes up into his mouth the same time as the man ejaculated
by Sxfndr December 6, 2020
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