The principle of maximizing the pleasure of a new television series, by delaying the immediate and empty gratification of single episodes, building to a climax when the season can be enjoyed in its entirety.
I've been abstaining for months from the new season of Mad Men so when the box set is out I can practice my Tantric Television on the couch with the girlfriend.
by Ralph Marathon April 27, 2012
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The name given to the hours of tv when no one should be watching, namely 3am.
Obviously the name derives from the fact that anyone with a job or someone who attends school should be asleep and not watching the garbage that permeates the airways at these hours.
An interesting note to make is that during these hours, the likelihood of an error happening with a broadcast signal is infinitely more likely to happen.
First used by Rebeltaxi in his video “Top 10 Worst Animated Songs”
The name given to the hours of tv when no one should be watching, namely 3am.
Obviously the name derives from the fact that anyone with a job or someone who attends school should be asleep and not watching the garbage that permeates the airways at these hours.
An interesting note to make is that during these hours, the likelihood of an error happening with a broadcast signal is infinitely more likely to happen.
First used by Rebeltaxi in his video “Top 10 Worst Animated Songs”
P1: Damn bro u look tired af man
P2: Shit man I stayed up all night watching unemployment television.
P1: tf is unemployment television
P2: 3am tv, when people who have no lives watch tv. Its all shit anyways.
P2: Shit man I stayed up all night watching unemployment television.
P1: tf is unemployment television
P2: 3am tv, when people who have no lives watch tv. Its all shit anyways.
by TheUltimateDx April 24, 2023
Get the Unemployment Television mug.Also known as Black Exploitation Television. A poor representation of Black people in society; a glorification of big booties, gold teeth, tha projects and crack heads, pimps and hoes, and relentless violence. An utter disgrace, but it sells.
by Miss Blake May 13, 2005
Get the Black Entertainment Television mug.A conservative organization that monitors the content of television shows in order to determine which ones are okay to let their children watch. While many complain that they are trying to infringe upon free speech, they are actually performing a very valuable service. You can figure out how good any given show is by how low they rate it.
I learned that 'Family Guy' is a really good show based on the very low rating that the parent's television council gave it.
by rustyshackleford August 15, 2007
Get the parent's television council mug.Fantastic Canadian-made older kids' show aired during Nickelodeon's infancy. Involving snot jokes, barf jokes, fart jokes, and other similar hoohah, it was notable for naming one of its castmembers "Moose" despite the fact that she was a young human female.
Did you know Alanis Morrisette got her start on `You Can't Do That On Television` back in the day? Even still, I like it anyway.
by Neilmiser May 6, 2004
Get the You Can't Do That On Television mug.Media Watchdog group which claims to be non-partisan composed of bored housewives who drink their daily glass of wine a day who believe that they themselves should not parent their children, but in fact, the major networks should. L. Brent Bozell III, the founder, also heads up a similarly non-partisan organization which watches the news networks looking to prove a liberal bias trying to destroy this country, and is against all gay rights.
We, the Parents Television Council are highly opposed to the nudity contained within Grand Theft Auto. Before we thought it was simply a tool to teach the children about Black culture, but now we've learned it's just filth.
by Talvin August 11, 2005
Get the Parents Television Council mug.From observation, recognising that the general standard of television in my opinion has deteriorated and continues to do so year by year, so much so I now watch very little, I’ve found as far as the programme quality and content on all television channels, the following Doghouse's Laws of Television often apply.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
I started compiling this list several years ago and some of these "laws" are now occasionally mentioned by contributors to a specific TV network message board, though of course they can apply to any channel.
I'm sure other contributors may relate to some of them and can think of other examples of practices which could be added to the list.
With a new programme, if your impression of it after ten minutes is that it's going to be rubbish, you’ll only be right 95% of the time.
The number of advance programme trails screened, will be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme. The ”best bits” of any programme will be included in the trail.
The volume of background music will often be in inverse proportion to the amount of watchable activity on the screen at that time.
Any TV audience gets the standard of programmes it deserves. It’s no good complaining about the quality of a programme if you continue to watch it.
If an idea for a programme suggested to a TV network commissioning department isn’t another soap in one form or another, or requires an "in your face" presenter/auto-cutie, celebrities, judges, phone votes, or the inclusion of dysfunctional members of the public, it is unlikely to be made.
The number of programme presenters appearing at any one time, will usually be in inverse proportion to the quality of the programme.
The number and variety of similar programmes on TV, are likely to be in inverse proportion to their cost to present.
To reach the widest audience, in a programme where the subject is of a specific nature, it may include totally unrelated elements in an attempt to also “engage” viewers who aren’t the slightest bit interested in the actual topic, in a futile attempt to increase the ratings.
Some programmes, even a few news bulletins, given the level at which the programme makers pitch their production, should have the words; "for Dummies" added to the title.
If you've any doubts about watching a programme, from the trails or advertising you've seen, take a chance, give it a miss.
by Doghouse Riley November 2, 2008
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