Joey Essex is the embodiment of everything that is wrong with the World. The definition of Joey Essex can be broken down into two parts;
1) Joey: The easiest name to pronounce for someone with an IQ lower than his own age, the two syllables can in fact be pronounced as any other combination of slurred syllables when drunk to give the same result.
2) Essex: Not actually his surname, this is simply his home as he is too dumb to remember both his name AND address.... hence Joey Essex
1) Joey: The easiest name to pronounce for someone with an IQ lower than his own age, the two syllables can in fact be pronounced as any other combination of slurred syllables when drunk to give the same result.
2) Essex: Not actually his surname, this is simply his home as he is too dumb to remember both his name AND address.... hence Joey Essex
Taxi Driver: Where to?
Joey Essex: I'm Joey Essex..... er...... Joey Essex......Essex..... yeah proper Reem
Taxi Driver: Fucking waste of skin....
Joey Essex: I'm Joey Essex..... er...... Joey Essex......Essex..... yeah proper Reem
Taxi Driver: Fucking waste of skin....
by 4dam4ntium February 5, 2015
Get the Joey Essexmug. by kirn October 22, 2017
Get the Essex wankmug. by I'm british yeah fam June 15, 2021
Get the Essex girlmug. 
Get the Essex Retardmug. With the younger generations which I am apart of myself, Essex Boys tend to think they are hard just because they got the latest Gucci and got parents ballin' in the money, they ride around the county with their scooters and BMX's and live on a diet of McDonald's McFlurrys they stole and Energy drinks, however some of us are a bit more like me, a bit shyer, very introverted, hard working and respectful to others in public at the very least.
When it comes to Essex Girls, only a part of the stereotype is true. No Essex girls wear fucking Stilettos, fact. And not all say 'you alright love?' every two fucking seconds, however only a couple do actually do that. The part that is true, is that Essex Girls are for the most part, very slutty and gravitate towards the traditional 'Cool Guy' who they will inevitable suck off everyday after school and then start dating only to break up 2 hours later. They wear extremely tight and short skirts to school, that throughout the day will 'conveniently' creep up their body to the point where their ass is almost exposed. Their faces are approximately 70% makeup and these girls jump to conclusions quicker than Usain Bolt can do the fucking 100m sprint. They often wear shorts, maybe skinny half ripped jeans, extremely tight leggings, mini skirt, crop tops, latest Adidas and Nike shit, ten tonnes of makeup, perfume and more fucking perfume, Victoria Secret shit or just any bra or panties that make you look a fucking slut.
When it comes to Essex Girls, only a part of the stereotype is true. No Essex girls wear fucking Stilettos, fact. And not all say 'you alright love?' every two fucking seconds, however only a couple do actually do that. The part that is true, is that Essex Girls are for the most part, very slutty and gravitate towards the traditional 'Cool Guy' who they will inevitable suck off everyday after school and then start dating only to break up 2 hours later. They wear extremely tight and short skirts to school, that throughout the day will 'conveniently' creep up their body to the point where their ass is almost exposed. Their faces are approximately 70% makeup and these girls jump to conclusions quicker than Usain Bolt can do the fucking 100m sprint. They often wear shorts, maybe skinny half ripped jeans, extremely tight leggings, mini skirt, crop tops, latest Adidas and Nike shit, ten tonnes of makeup, perfume and more fucking perfume, Victoria Secret shit or just any bra or panties that make you look a fucking slut.
by Thot Patrol 69 June 1, 2019
Get the Essex Peoplemug. The type of girl that goes on yubo to look for something ✨meaningful✨ only to get their heartbroken and look like an idiot in the process.
Bro 1- “Ay bro are you still chatting to that Essex Girl”
Bro 2- “G. She wants to link man and watch a film at odeon but I just want a beat styll”
Bro 2- “G. She wants to link man and watch a film at odeon but I just want a beat styll”
by Buxton water bottle March 24, 2021
Get the Essex Girlmug. A group of guys from Essex who think they are alot better than they really are, they deem themselves to be the ultimate partyers however are not more than wannabe's. They aspire to be like other groups who are more popular and more fun.
Essex Divs always refuse invitations to be social, then when they do go out think they are hardcore, however end up being nightlined..
As a social group their sole aim is to be campus celebrities.
Essex Divs always refuse invitations to be social, then when they do go out think they are hardcore, however end up being nightlined..
As a social group their sole aim is to be campus celebrities.
Oh dear look at that lot, such Essex Divs, they think theyre on it but theyre nothing compared to the Hot Fuzz, when will they learn!
by THEHOTFUZZ December 8, 2009
Get the Essex Divsmug.