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pythagorean theorem

me: "the pythagorean theorem hurts meh brain, i hate it"
random person: "but its useful-"
me: *death stare*
by Box Of Bingus April 21, 2021
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The Smith Theorem

When you worship your buddy so, so much, that you actually become gay... not only for them, but for all semi-attractive men... I'm talking like 5's and up
The lusty look he has after seeing those tight, blue golf pants can only be described as "The Smith Theorem"
by 7FeetOfScary May 13, 2015
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first fundamental theorem of calculus

The first fundamental theorem of calculus states that (just trying to remember here), with F(x) being the antiderivative of f(x), while u stand for the upper bound and l stands for the lower bound, the definite integral of a function f(x) is equal to F(u) - F(l).
"Solve the integral from 2 to 3 of x^2" Well, this should be easy. Just use the first fundamental theorem of calculus.
The antiderivative of x^2 = (x^3)/3. (3^3)/3 = 9, and (2^3)/3 = 8/3. 9 - 8/3 = 19/3, which is equal to 6.3333333... Time to search this up on good ol' Wolfram Alpha. *Checks* Alright!
by CMCTT June 26, 2017
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Infinite Jason Theorem

Greg: Wow! Jason actually had a good idea
Sam: Well the infinite jason theorem says he'll get one every once in a while
by MONKEY EMPEROR February 25, 2021
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Yombini’s Theorem

Yombini’s Theorem states that if you insta-lock Jett in Valorant, you are guaranteed to bottom frag.
Person 1: “Check out my new strategy of insta-locking an agent in Valorant!”

Person 2: “Let me guess…you’re insta-locking Jett?”

Person 1: “Yes…”

Person 2: “Wow, how dirty. Yombini’s Theorem will bite you in the ass.”
by TotallyNotAJettPlayer January 26, 2022
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Infinite Covid Concern Theorem

A scientific theorem used by communication psychologists: an upper-class white liberal will find a way to mention how they are more careful to COVID-19 virus than any other person in the room
"and then when we got to the theatre, they required masks, but said we could take them off to eat Popcorn... you can guess what happened haha"

"Does Dad talk about anything but covid?"

"He sure is proving the Infinite Covid Concern Theorem!"
by thatsrightimFUNNY March 20, 2022
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The Smootheddie81 theorem

A theorem that states by adding odd numbers together in a numerical sequential order starting from 1 and continuing to the next odd number, the sum of the numbers will equal a perfect square. Example 1+3+5= 9. 9 is 3^2
The professor just gave us a test on the smootheddie81 theorem yesterday, luckily i studied all night and got a C+.
by The1stAB July 15, 2022
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